


The Devil’s Spawn is NOT the Anti-Christ!

by Glimare



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Anti-Christ, Big Brother Amenadiel (Lucifer TV), Deals, F/M, House of Mysteries - Freeform, Linda's just that awesome, Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attack, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Scare, Pretty disjointed so don't expect a strong narative, Therapy, he actually likes kids, just for fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:54:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 32,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22298143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glimare/pseuds/Glimare
Summary: Lucifer got Chloe pregnant. If he were anyone else, it'd be fine!But Lucifer's the Devil.Chloe's in danger because people are idiots and will destroy anything they think is a threat.Time to bring his A-Game... if he can overcome his panic attacks.Join Lucifer and his allies as they tackle the problems and cuteness that comes with the Devil's actual spawn, who will NOT destroy the world.
Relationships: Amenadiel & Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Amenadiel/Linda Martin (Lucifer TV), Chloe Decker & Dan Espinoza, Chloe Decker & Ella Lopez, Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar, Dan Espinoza & Lucifer Morningstar, Ella Lopez & Lucifer Morningstar, Linda Martin & Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV)
Comments: 53
Kudos: 299





	1. It's All Bad News

**Author's Note:**

> Hallo! Kinda new to this fandom so bear with me and my ignorance. I only have up through season 3 and have to wait on roommates to get back onto netflix and see 4. Yes, I'm cheap.  
> The idea for this is simply a series of simulations while I work, and I work in the maternity ward. Also religious and have my own thoughts on what the Anti-Christ actually is in here, but I'm going to try not to be preachy. Like, at all. Don't overthink it. Plus I love DC comics so there's going to be other characters popping in later.  
> Anywho, everything's a bit disjointed so it's more like a linear compilation of one-shots surrounding Lucifer and Chloe's growing family, particularly at the beginning. Not a strong running narrative between chapters. I'll post as the chapters come, which could be anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to dropping off the map entirely! I do that...  
> SO! Thanks for clicking and I hope you like the fics! ^^V

* * *

No.

No no no no!

Nooooo!

No no no no NO!

This was bad. This was very bad!

Head spinning, stomach twisting, pulse racing, breathing labored, thoughts fractured, Lucifer did the only thing he could think of at that moment.

He ran away.

Flew away actually, but same thing.

Ran away from his problem as fast as he could.

And straight to a place of healing and safety to somehow make this very bad thing just go away.

“Linda!” Lucifer all but crashed through his therapist’s back door and into her living room, making the woman nearly jump out of her skin at the dinner table. Charlie gave a small scream as Amenadiel accidentally flung his mashed carrots into the air. “Linda! It’s horrible!”

“Lucifer!”

“This can’t be happening! Please tell me it’s not happening!” This just could not be happening! No it could not!

“Lucifer!” His therapist struggled out of her seat for a second before trying to approach him calmly. He wouldn’t blame her for acting as she does later. Last time he showed up unexpectedly like this he was freaking out over his demon wings. Right then though he was not in the right frame of mind, shaking and hysterical and he wanted her to work her therapist magic to make everything all better but she couldn’t make it all better because he really screwed up this time! “Lucifer, please. Take a slow breath and tell me what -”

“It’s all my fault! It’s completely my fault!” His hands started raking through his hair, starting to turn red in his panic. “I’ve doomed her! Please tell me this isn’t happening!”

“Lucifer!” Amenadiel grabbed his shoulders and shook him once, getting his attention for a few seconds as only a big brother could. “What. Happened.”

“Chloe.” His brain just couldn’t quite accept it. “She’s… she’s...”

“What happened to Chloe?” His brother tensed, ready to stop time and fly off to their favorite miracle. It must have been something so horrible Lucifer would risk everything to save her and leave her side for a second.

“I’ve condemned her! It’s all my fault! I… I…”

“LUCIFER! Tell us what happened to Chloe!” His panic spread to those before him and his trembling would not stop, his thoughts scattered everywhere. “Is she hurt? Did someone take her? What happened!”

“She’s pregnant.”

Time seemed to stop without Amenadiel doing anything.

Didn’t they know how BAD this was?!

“And it’s all my fault! It has to be!” Lucifer continued to shake, redness spreading down his wrists. “I’ve condemned her and –“

“Brother! This is wonderful news!” Gleefully Amenadiel hugged him, grinning from ear to ear.

Linda looked at them and her son briefly, very confused. “Isn’t it?”

“NO! This is terrible news!” Lucifer all but flung his brother off of him, eyes going red and wild. His therapist took a step back, seeing the danger he was no doubt, but sticking around because of how good she truly was. “I’ve condemned her!”

“I don’t see how –”

“I’m the DEVIL! She bears MY SPAWN! Do you have ANY idea what that means?!”

“Charlie’s going to have a cousin!”

How naive could his brother be! “NO! Well, yes! But that’s not the point!”

“Is… this baby… going to be the Anti-Christ? The ender of the world?”

Both men looked to Linda who clearly was the smarter of the pair. Her face was a shade paler but she was still just confused. Glad one of them didn’t needed it spelled out for them, Lucifer violently shook his head. “No, it won’t. But the world will think that anyway and others like Kinley already have their eyes on her and they will do everything in their power to stop this spawn from being born and will not hesitate to kill her! They’ve done it before! They’ll do it again!”

“Do it again?” Amenadiel became confused, no longer giddy. “As in there have been others? Linda and Charlie weren’t the first?”

The two exchanged confused looks as Lucifer shook his head. “She’s the first to actually give birth to a celestial, but Linda is not the first pregnancy. They didn’t exactly have effective birth control methods until the 20th century.”

He started to pace, wishing he knew where Linda’s liquor cabinet was as he ran his hands through his hair over and over again. “Somehow, every time it happened, fanatics who don’t understand their own scripture, found the poor girl I knocked up and killed her as painfully as possible. I always found out when she landed in Hell. Every damn time!

“And this time I’ve condemned Chloe!” The last thing he wanted was to hurt her like this. He couldn’t continue without her at his side! And now, because of nut cases and failed prevention, she was going to die! “I can’t – I just can’t! I can’t have a child! It will kill her! I really am poison to – ”

“Lucifer!” Linda cut into his thoughts as sharply as Azreal’s blade, getting his attention for a few moments. Slowly, glaring him down, she took a step towards him. “Did you explain any of this to Chloe? Or did you just – fly off in a panic the second you found out?”

An ice-cold shower seemed to pour over his body as he realized what he just did. Petrified, he looked back out the door he barged through. Linda sighed, exasperated. “You did.”

“I should get back to her. I need to – ”

“Nope! No, that ship has sailed. Amenadiel, keep him here.” His therapist threw up her hands and turned back to the kitchen, resignation in her step. His brother grabbed him across his waist and put him in a chair, obeying his partner’s every command. “Lucifer’s in no state to fix this on his own. He needs to calm down and be less… devilly… before he has a prayer. Now where did I put the scotch...”

“You don’t understand!” Still shaky, Lucifer tried to get up and fix things, knowing he did wrong. First, he got his love pregnant and then he flew out the door, telling her this was a bad thing. Course it was a bad thing! Being pregnant with the devil’s spawn was certainly a death sentence and every one of the past victims wound up in Hell! BECAUSE of HIM! “I have to find some way to protect her! And she probably thinks I abandoned her!”

“You didn’t abandon her. You went for help.” Amenadiel sighed loudly, shaking his head. “Linda’s right. You’re in no condition to explain anything right now. You need to calm down and –”

“Calm down?! This isn’t your spawn condemning the woman you love to death!” Lucifer managed to get to his feet, staring down his brother and waving over to his son. “No human cares whether you have a child! They don’t even know your name! Do you have any idea how many devil-spawn Anti-Christ fables there are in the world? Hundreds! If not thousands! It’s humanity’s second favorite bad guy! Prepped and ready for them the second they can’t think of any other villain in their play!

“Can’t explain how a witch is so powerful? Make her Satan’s kid! A psychotic starting a world war? Must be the Devil’s seed! Someone has a hankering for human flesh? His mum must have done the nasty with the demon king! Unexplainable markings and powers on some urchin? Old Scratch raped their mum! Do you have any idea how many times I was vilified so badly they made impossible for even the child of a one night stand to have their first breath? Do you?!”

Amenadiel seemed to turn into a stone wall. “Clearly not.”

“Exactly! And now the Detective is going to be a sitting target because my seed plowed her fields and made fruit! They’re going to destroy the entire farm just to make sure their fantasy bad guy doesn’t get a chance. So get out of my –”

“Sit down and drink this.” Linda shoved herself between them and pushed a glass more than half-filled with scotch into his hand. Stunned, he fell back into his seat at the slightest push from his therapist. Her firm look was all it really took to shut up for a minute or so, along with her much needed advice. “If you go flying off to Chloe in this state, you’ll only make things worse. Amenadiel, could you take care of Charlie and… get me a drink? This is going to take a bit.”

“Bu–”

“One minute, Lucifer, or so help me…” The strained look on her face was enough to give the devil pause and even got her angel boyfriend to do as he was asked. Linda took a few long, even breaths, moving her cellphone between hands before turning back to him and sitting down across from him. “Okay, let’s take this from the top. Slowly and calmly.”

“But… But Chloe is –”

“She’ll be fine. Maze will be with her shortly. But right now, we need to take care of you. Thank you, Amenadiel.” Linda graciously accepted the glass of wine from her dinner, taking a quick sip before starting again. “Let’s start from the top. You came crashing in here, during dinner, because Chloe Decker told you she was pregnant with your child.”

“Yes. Exactly that. And I –”

“Almost screaming that it was a very bad thing because it put her in danger and you didn’t want to hurt her or lose her.”

“Screaming?” That didn’t sound like him.

“My ears are still ringing, Lucifer.” Guilt hit him like a brick, getting him to look into his scotch with dread. More of his skin was turning red and scaly just at the thought. Why did his self-hatred have to manifest itself so easily? A soft hand touched his, trying to comfort but instead made it spread a little faster. Linda shouldn’t have to touch something so disgusting. “I’m not blaming you. You were clearly having a panic attack.”

“A what?” That got his attention. Panic attack?

“It’s something that happens to people when something triggers a traumatizing memory and we get stuck… in something like a Hell Loop. Fear grips us so tightly. We can’t breathe, start to shake, can’t think clearly, raise our voices. Say things that, under other circumstances, we wouldn’t say. Some people become physically ill, others pass out. Many, run away to where they feel safe, whether it’s in their minds or to a friend or even in prayer. But it is important to calm yourself and confront your fears slowly and rationally. Panic attacks are nothing to be ashamed of, but they cannot control your life or influence your decisions.

“You had a panic attack when you learned Chloe was pregnant with your child. And you immediately came over here. To a place you knew was safe and could get help.” Linda gave him as kind and gentle a smile as she could, comforting him a little more than he deserved. “Now, let us help you.”

Silent at last, Lucifer gulped the nothing in his throat before taking a sip of his glass and looking away. He could not deny anything she said, couldn’t deflect. He came flying in like a scared child, somewhat hoping his therapist and big brother could make everything okay and the entire revelation was a nightmare, not real. But it was real.

If he wanted a prayer in keeping Chloe’s love, he had to get himself under control. He nodded and took a slow breath. “I’m terrified. More than anything in this world. Or in Hell or Heaven. This… this thing! Just by existing! It will kill her!”

“I gave birth to Charlie, no complications. What makes this child any different?”

“I’m not talking about the – the – the actual process. I’m talking about it being mine!”

“Yours… as a man? Or as the Devil?”

“As the Devil! Naturally!” He started to get up to pace, but a single hand placed on his knee kept him in one place. Damned therapist knew exactly how to stop him. Lucifer let out a shaky breath. “Humanity’s come up with this – this – deranged fantasy that any child of mine would one day destroy the world!”

“The Anti-Christ.”

“Bloody Hell! Talk about a misinterpretation!” He ran one hand through his hair, the other nursing his scotch. “The Anti-Christ isn’t a person at all! It’s an idea! It’s literally anyone or any organization that actively opposes Christ and his teachings! Call him a work of fiction or deny his divinity all together!”

“Soo… Atheists?” She looked between Lucifer and Amenadiel rocking Charlie. Both of them shook their heads.

“Not necessarily.”

“Muslims?”

“Not really.”

“… Buddhists?”

“No…”

“Vegans.”

“Dad, no!” Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose. “You don’t have to not believe in him to be Anti-Christs. You have to actively fight against him and his teachings and disciples to be Anti-Christ. It’s literally in the name! Anti. Christ. Against. Christ. Duh!” He shook his head and drank a little more, his peace of mind returning slowly. “Honestly, there’s no point in going against him head-on like they do. I’ve met several Anti-Christs in Hell and their loops mostly involve learning how wrong they were. Many were as bad as the deranged followers who would kill Chloe if they learn she’s pregnant.”

For a second, he thought he heard a gasp but he shook it off as he took another drink. The tumbler was nearly gone but Amenadiel came over to save the day a second later. “Bloody bastards… kill first, think later. No child of mine would be one of those nuts if I had any say in it. Rather have baby brother Jesus as their nanny. Be damn good at it too.”

He took another long drink, missing Linda’s silent ‘really?’ look to Amenadiel, who nodded in agreement. In all their talks before, Jesus never really came up. And now wasn’t really the time to talk about him anyway. Back on subject.

“So… there are people out there who would kill Chloe, just because she’s pregnant with your child.”

“Yes.” His voice dropped, looking off in pain from the memories. Seeing those women in Hell, screaming and cursing him for giving them a wild night, and then burning alive. Some were hung, others drowned, one crushed under boulders while another stoned, but fire was the most common. “I… couldn’t prevent it as much as I have in the past century. There were ways, but the fail rate was quite high. I would meet a girl, spend the night, and then big brother over here would take me back within a few days. And a few months on Earth later, I get to see that same girl, screaming at me for abandoning her and letting her die. All because modern condoms weren’t available.”

“Is this the real reason you claim to not like children?”

Lucifer’s heart seemed to stop.

“Because accidentally creating them resulted in women being murdered?”

The scaly redness on his skin intensified as he sat there, refusing to answer. Tears came unbidden to his eyes, looking anywhere but at Linda, Amenadiel, or little Charlie. Still, his eyes landed on an empty rocker. One of many empty rockers out there. If they cost him the woman he loved, the rocker should stay empty. He took another long drink, unable to deny anything.

He heard Linda take a long breath. “I see. You’re scared. For the mother. For the child. You’re scared you are the reason they will suffer and die at the hands of lunatics.”

“Kinley was willing to go through the Detective and Eve to send me back to Hell. He had allies. Like minded lunatics. I wouldn’t put murder past them for a second.”

“Lucifer, you have every right to be scared.” Her words brought his eyes back to hers and he saw the understanding he needed. Linda took a slow breath, shaking her head. “In fact, I’m scared for Chloe too. And the baby. After everything we went through with Charlie… It’s a hundred times worse for you.”

“Hoh, then there’s that.” Bitterly, Lucifer shook his head. “I almost forgot about the Celestial end of this. I barely manage to keep the demons at bay and Amenadiel had to fight to keep Charlie out of the Silver City. Imagine what will happen once Dad – No, no, no. That bastard already knows. Probably arranged it. No. When one of our other siblings learn and try to figure it all out, that is when I’ll have another round of problems. Bloody hell… Can’t get a break, can I?”

Hand through his hair, it was a miracle his devil face hadn’t appeared yet. All of this was his fault. There was no shifting blame or easy forgiveness for this one. He screwed up bad this time. Chloe was going to be enemy number one to several insane killer groups and it wouldn’t end when the spawn was born or an adult. If they made it to birth. Would they even be able to keep it? Dad may take it to the Silver City right after birth and they would never have a chance to name it. Or demons could rise, kidnap it, and try to make it the ruler of Hell in his place, this time with a better plan in mind. And all because he failed to prevent conception.

The Devil having a kid was the worst possible event in his life.

“Doesn’t look like it.” Linda answered meekly, understanding everything he said for once. This time they really seemed to be on the same page, and it didn’t help the situation in the slightest.

Significantly calmer than when he came in, Lucifer just hung his head. Defeated. Pregnancy is all it took to subdue the Devil. What would his mother say about this? He took another drink then cradled the glass between his knees. The problems just kept getting bigger and bigger. How was he going to solve this one? He couldn’t just make a deal. Not with fanatics. He couldn’t be around Chloe every moment of every day either. He might – might – be able to make it past the Celestial problems, but the human ones? As long as he lived, he didn’t want to kill another one. He got away with Cain only because of the contradicting rules Dad set up, but the curse now on him, the one making his skin more demonic the more his negative emotions took control, was the price he now had to pay.

He hated the feel of killing.

And he hated himself for killing even more.

“Lucifer… what if… what if none of those problems existed?”

The Devil looked up to her, confused. “What?”

Linda licked her lips before trying again. “Hypothetically. If… If you were… just a man. A normal human being. Not the Devil. Not an angel. Just a man. Who loved a woman with all his heart as you do. If it were just you and Chloe, nothing else.”

“But I am –”

“Humor me. In this situation. Just you. Just Chloe. Just your love. Nothing else. If the scenario that sent you here wasn’t laden down with all the problems of the ‘Devil’s Spawn’, but just you learning that the love of your life was pregnant with your child, physical proof of your love and devotion, how would you feel? How do you feel, knowing Chloe and you made a baby?”

“I...”

Lucifer had to pause and think for a moment. How did he feel? Just him. Just Chloe. Just their child. The child they made.

He leaned back in his seat, lost in thought as his emotions pushed past his fears and worries. How did he feel? “I… Scared? Baffled? Wonder? It’s… hard to place. I… feel like I’ve made a new star… and kissed Chloe for the first time. And I don’t know what to do with it.”

“Are you angry… at the baby?”

He shook his head. “It’s an innocent. I cannot be angry at an innocent.”

“Are you angry at Chloe?”

“Dad, no! Never!”

“So… you would even say, pushing everything else aside and just thinking of Chloe and the baby, that you’re… actually happy about it?”

Linda was making that face, the one saying he was close to discovering something but wanted him to say it. He knew that face well by now, but for once all he could do was go along with it. “Yes. You could say I am.”

“Great.” Linda smiled broadly, satisfied. Then the raised her cellphone closer to her lips. “Did you get all that, Chloe?”

What?

“ _Loud and clear._ ”

What?

“Wonderful. I’m going to hand you over to Lucifer so you can work the rest out yourselves. And congratulations.” Getting up, she handed over her phone to her patient, grinning.

“What? Did you call –”

“Technically I’m not on the clock, all I’m doing is helping out a friend. Not providing therapy, so I can share this meeting with whomever I choose.” Linda gave him a stern look in the eye as he dumbfoundedly gaped at her. “Fix this yourself. We’ll worry about the nuts and the Celestials after you two work this out. Remember, Chloe is human and has human emotions. Her first thoughts were in our hypothetical conversation, not your… very understandable fears. Just be a new expectant parent, not the ruler of Hell, and you two will be fine.”

Smiling, she sipped her wine and went back to her now cold meal, high fiving Amenadiel as she passed him. Lucifer gaped after her for a minute, red retreating from his face and neck as he thanked himself for choosing to go to therapy all those years ago.


	2. Deals with Booze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer makes a deal outside his world. With liquor.

* * *

Lucifer swirled his drink, deep in thought. On his own, he was at a dead end. He had no experiences leading him towards a positive solution. Resources he had in abundance, but he didn’t know how to use them yet to make everything work in his favor. And he needed it to work in his favor.

Time was running out. There were only so many excuses to use before someone, anyone, would discover their secret. Eventually, they wouldn’t have a choice but to admit it anyway. Plus he hated lying. He could barely evade and bluff as is.

He needed to act. Now.

But dammit! Did Amenadiel have to take so bloody slow getting back to him? He sent out two prayers over the past few days and he was loath to do a third!

The swirl of his glass stopped. “About bloody time!”

“This better be important if you’re stopping me from negotiating with our siblings, Lucifer.” His brother stepped next to him at his private bar, irritation clouding his face. “I nearly had Michael convinced to do a day in Hell.”

Lucifer huffed out a laugh. “That prick would never do such a favor unless he was allowed to kill half of the Lilim, and you know it.”

Amenadiel just shook his head, unable to completely deny it. “Be it as it may, I hadn’t talked to Remiel yet. She may still try to take the baby away once it’s born.”

“She can wait a day.” He put his unfinished glass on the counter. “This can’t.”

His brother raised an eyebrow and time resumed. “How so?”

“Angels and demons wait for birth. Mortals do not.” The memory of all those women cursing his name would never cease to haunt him. “We don’t know the exact point of conception so we don’t know how far along she is. The Detective wants to see a doctor about it soon. Get a professional confirmation and not just… half a dozen pluses and lines.”

“How many tests did she take?”

He ignored the comment and sipped his drink. “Look, we don’t have as much time as you think. The next few months could… will… alert all the wrong people. I have to make a move now. So I need you here to guard them while I make… a deal.”

The way he said it showed exactly how much he loathed to do this, but it was the best, if maybe only, option he could come up with. Lucifer had no idea what resources his enemy had at their disposal, but it was good enough to kill almost a hundred women over the course of several millennia. He needed to out-think them, out resource them, even if that meant making deals with… well, irritating people.

Amenadiel must have picked up on his reluctance, becoming all the more confused. “A deal. What kind of deal?”

“One I hope I don’t regret.” He reached towards a full bottle of brandy, one he was saving for a special occasion, and got to his feet. Sighing heavily, he reached into his pocket and took out a set of keys he usually held in his safe. His brother’s eyes bulged at the sight of them, knowing full well what they were and for what purpose. Lucifer spotted the look and rolled his eyes. “Yes yes, they’re not supposed to leave Hell, but do you really expect me to let Gabriel or Castiel near these? You saw what they did to foxes!”

“Lucifer, why are you taking those out at all?” The seriousness of his tone would have annoyed him if he didn’t know how much this mattered. “The keys to Hell itself should -”

“I put a certain key on it’s ring and now it won’t come off. Believe me, I tried.” Though the keys looked identical to most people’s eyes, the King of Hell knew better. It wasn’t the shape of the key that mattered, but the eternal nature of it. Of each of them. He could find the right one blind, deaf, and on fire. Had in fact.

“Now, Maze will have the Detective, her spawn, Linda and Charlie here within the hour. For safekeeping. And maybe for...” Lucifer shook his head, halfway praying he wouldn’t have to expose any of them quite yet. Still, he knew what he was in for and it may be the only way to get results. “All you need to do is stay with them and be you until I come back. There… may be a visitor I send over for a bit so keep an eye on him.”

“Luci, what are you planning?” Amenadiel’s questioning face mirrored his heart to a degree. Was this really his only option? He could hardly think of any others. “What kind of a deal are you planning to make?”

“Hopefully, a good one.” Not looking at his brother, Lucifer walked up to one of his bookcases and reached far behind his second edition of Edgar Allen Poe’s poetry (and despite common opinion, he hadn’t met the man, not even when he died. The Devil didn’t know everyone) and inserted a certain key into a tiny hole he placed there when the penthouse was being refurbished. He turned it once and withdrew his hand to move the case to the side without losing a single book. Behind the case was a second door, one that didn’t really exist.

“Huh… I always wondered why you chose this place.” His brother wasn’t as dumb as he looked, making Lucifer smirk as he put the key into the not-really-there-door.

“The lay-lines were just too tempting to resist. Don’t get me wrong; I fell in love with this building at first fight. But…” He flashed a grin back at him impishly. “They certainly didn’t hurt the sales. I’ll close the door behind me, but it won’t be locked.”

“Hence why you need me to guard.” Amenadiel nodded slowly, understanding him a little more.

He nodded back. “Never know who owns the place now. Or if they have… pets. Be back soon! Order something for my return. And don’t burn the club down.”

Enough quipping. Time to bite the bullet and just… Lucifer unlocked the door and used the key as a handle, pushing his way inside. The shifting of plains vibrated through him, a sensation he never quite liked the feeling of. It put his wings on edge when he didn’t use them to do so. The sensation didn’t get any better when you would open your eyes and find an equally unimpressive room on the other side instead of something more life-shaking.

He took his key out of the door and pocketed it immediately, closing the door behind him firmly as he glanced about. Not much had changed since he used it last. Almost every wall had books or scrolls attached, with the occasional legendary item no one should really use just hanging about. The decor wasn’t too different from his penthouse really when you took the magic out of it. Why had one of the old owners turned it into a roaming library and museum anyway?

Sighing at the state, not wishing to believe it sunk so low, Lucifer strut through the room and turned a corner to where he hoped the bar remained. If the current owner hadn’t turned it into some kind of study or alchemy station, there probably were a few glasses he could use and likely some ice. It’d be a place to talk at least, and they needed to -

“ _Ezeerf redurtni!_ ”

A cold wind snapped around him, vainly intending to stop his movements. Lucifer stopped momentarily but took a step through the spell, ignoring it in favor of spotting the caster. He couldn’t suppress the amusement in his eyes. “Was that meant to stop me?”

On a balcony across the room from him stood a radiant young lady with raven hair and bright blue eyes, glaring down on him with a cheap magician’s wand pointed at his face. She may have looked intimidating if she didn’t look like she belonged on a Vegas magic show or the Playboy mansion. Sexy magician maybe, but far from intimidating to the Devil.

“ _Dael eb spets ruoy yam!_ ” Another spell struck at him and he had to move his brandy to the side just to be sure it didn’t get in the crossfire.

“Seriously! Do you really think that’ll work?” He shook his head, smirking knowingly. He kept on his path, headed straight to the bar he could now see. And was that another young lady there? Or was that -

“ _Mih dnib, sniahc degrof lleh!_ ”

Lucifer raised an eyebrow as thick, hot shackles struck out from the ground and grappled around his body. He actually stopped his advance, eyeing them and the young lady, mentally questioning her sanity. She had no idea who she was dealing with, but if she did this to anyone who entered the house unannounced like he owned the place, he had to be a little impressed. Though there really was no need to. The house could take care of itself. “Really? Is this necessary? Miss…”

“ _Ot nekops mehw ylno kaeps! Siel on dna!_ ”

Now he rolled his eyes. “Well, if you insist. Though I do expect some answers in return.”

The woman glared even harder at him as she leapt off the balcony and to the ground floor he was chained to. “How are you still talking?”

“Ah, actually, the real trick is getting me to shut up.” Lucifer grinned, knowing he was getting under her skin. Sue him. He’s the Devil. He jiggled the chains playfully. “Do you mind getting rid of these? They’re highly unnecessary.”

“Who are you? And how did you get in here?” If her eyes narrowed any further she’d be blind.

“I’m hardly in a position to give a proper introduction now, am I? Besides,” he smiled as coyly as possible, “you have yet to reveal your own name, Miss.

“As for how I came here,” he nudged his head backward, “I just used the backdoor. Wonderful if all you want is to make a pits-stop. Not so great if you’re trying to get good liquor.”

“There is no backdoor.” Dear Dad, she was going to blind herself!

“There is for me.” Without breaking a beat, he stepped forward, breaking her chains and letting them fall off of him as he extended his hand to her to shake. “Lucifer Morningstar, the maker of the ‘House of Mystery’, as you call it now. Pretty sure that old sorcerer called it something else when I made it several millennia ago, but it was even more of a mouthful back then.

“And you are?”

The woman gaped at him, eyes finally open to their fullest extent as she froze in place. Well, maybe she’d start seeing things a little clearer now. Still, he wanted a name. When she didn’t react, he sighed and put his hand down, shaking his head with a sigh. “Perhaps another time. I’m on a bit of a schedule. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go talk to someone who knows me on sight. Which is clearly not you.”

He sidestepped her and went straight to the bar where a very violet naked(?) woman(??) waited behind. Lucifer looked up and down her for a minute or two, trying to figure her out. Though she had boobs, she lacked the vital ingredient to determine gender in mortals, along with a lot of other things. Like hair. And a pulse. He chewed over the possibilities in his mind before smirking. Obviously. “Ah. So my creation has gained a type of sentience and is growing its own wings. What do you call yourself, little one?”

“Black Orchid, Maker.” She nodded her head slightly, almost like a bow but not so obscene. It made him proud. She raised her hands almost in offering across the counter. “Would you like me to hold onto that for a time?”

“That would be ideal, yes. Thank you.” Lucifer gave her the bottle of brandy then started adjusting his cuffs. “If you would, prepare it to the ideal temperature for the one it’s for. I believe you know his tastes.”

Orchid nodded again and immediately went to work. He grinned. The strange obedience wasn’t what he really wanted, but the House did know when someone intended harm or not. He never tried to abuse what he created, even though he was hardly ever there. It was nice not to be questioned or attacked and to be able to trust someone for something so simple.

“Well then,” he straightened his lapels and turned towards another doorway, “I best be -”

“Why are you here!”

Ah. The silent bunny magician finally got some nerves back. Lucifer calmly turned to her, a small smile on his face. “Pardon?”

The woman shook as she glared at him, whether from fright or from anger, he couldn’t tell. “Why. Is the Devil. In. My. HOUSE!”

“So you’re the current owner. I’m guessing you didn’t read the fine print of the contract.”

He gave her a smug smile before reaching into the ethereal pocket the House of Mysteries deed rested and pulled it out. He willed it to enlarge and stand before the two of them, specifically at the point where he was involved. “Says right here: Though the owner is allowed to welcome or reject any mortal or immortal of their choosing, the creator of the House of Mysteries may come and go as he pleases at any time or place regardless of the owner’s will. As the creator mostly uses the House of Mysteries for storage, as a short cut, or to just breathe clean air once in a while… Blah blah blah… You get the point. I’m not going to go through your pants’ drawers if that’s what you’re wondering. Not even sure if you have any, Miss Zatanna Zatara.

“Point of the matter is, Zatanna,” he dragged out her name, having found it at the bottom of the contract, “this place is technically my magical storage container. You have access to the Devil’s library, and I don’t give a damn what you do so long as it all stays here. And you add to the liquor cabinet. Seriously, is that all you have?”

He pointed to the bar, sadly disappointed. The selection shrank considerably since he was last in! “At least Johnny kept it stocked. Are you strapped on cash or just that cheap?”

Zatanna kept looking back and forth between him and the contract, her face growing paler. “This… is the Devil’s house?”

“Storage container,” he corrected. “I need a place to put my collections that’s not covered in ash. But initially, it was made for a wizard who liked a rock a little much who needed a safe place to stay. So I made this and it became a win-win. You get access to the Devil’s library, I don’t get ash on my crap. And scotch. Seriously, is that all you have?”

He tried to make it light so she’d snap out of it, but the magician bunny needed more time to evaluate her life choices. Sighing, Lucifer decided to go back to his plan. Time was of the essence. “Very well. Try to find a loophole. You don’t be the first to attempt getting out of one of my deals. If you’ll excuse me.”

Not waiting for the woman to try anything new, he strut through the house and towards the front door. By now it was exactly where he wanted it to be, by the person he needed to talk to. Now. He paused at the door for a moment and made certain he had his key ring safely hidden in his best pocket before opening the door.

Straight into a filthy back alley.

Littered with knocked out humans turning into demonic creatures.

Only two were still standing and facing a lone human in a trench coat.

Lucifer glared over the scene, trying to not react too badly to the mess. This… this is what he went back to Hell to prevent. Clearly in this Earth, the demons either didn’t listen to him or those in charge of Hell didn’t give a damn about the balance of the cosmos. As much as he resented his dad, he didn’t want the multiverse in this kind of chaos.

His eyes flared and his voice echoed in a low rumble over the unconscious demons. “ **Go home**.”

Almost instantly, the demonic features of these bodies shrank away, leaving perfectly healthy, albeit unconscious, humans in their wake. The last two demons even crumbled into unconsciousness just before they could be hit with one of the man’s tools. The man stumbled at the lack of resistance but managed to get his footing back easily enough. He seemed to stare at the sight, likely because of how easy it suddenly became, and Lucifer thought it was probably the best time to come forward.

“Quite the day-job you got here, Johnny! Bit surprised though on the lack of… well… death.” He lightly toed one of the fallen with his shoe as he came closer to the man, trying to be casual and not as desperate as he really was. “I was under the impression any demon that crossed your path was as good as ash.”

The blond shook his head in his trench coat, biting back a bitter laugh. He turned to him without fear, something Lucifer always liked about this mortal and almost sneered. “Speak of the Devil… You know, Luci, my job would be a lot easier if you just did yours.”

Lucifer gave him a pained smile. “I am, actually. But these pests aren’t under my ruling. You know how my dad is about realities and all that.”

“And yet, you. Are here.” The man took a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it with a bit of magic. Oh, the skills of this man. He took a drag before puffing at him, glaring slightly. “What do you want, Lucifer.”

“A great deal, John Constantine.” He made a point of saying his name correctly this time, sobering up a little. His seriousness caught the man’s attention a little better than before. “But for now, merely a talk. In exchange for my best brandy. On neutral ground.”

Lucifer, almost dramatically, waved over to the house of mysteries, still waiting for them at the other end of the battlefield. John raised an eyebrow, watching him as he smoked for a little longer. “A talk?”

“A quick chat, I hope. Easily the price for a good drink. From all appearances,” he waved over the field of unconscious mortals at their feet, “you could use one.”

Another drag. “Neutral ground?”

“The house has its own mind. Either of us can leave whenever we please.”

A slow inhale with a harsher eye. “Zee?”

“The young lady currently in ownership of the house?” He thumbed over to the place, confirming the question. John nodded. “She’s fine. Just reading the fine details of the deed at the moment. Bit of a shock for her to have the Devil walking through the backdoor.”

The mortal rolled his eyes. “That ‘backdoor’ only exists when _you_ want it to.”

“True, but you must admit, I rarely use it. This is actually the second time this decade.” He waved back to the door again. “Shall we?”

John inclined his lit hand forward, smirking slightly. “After you.”

Lucifer smiled back and took the lead back to the House of Mysteries, privately thinking of a bible joke he missed out on. Chloe would have rolled her eyes at it and a string of innuendos would have followed, flirting and chatting as if nothing would change. His heart stung slightly, knowing things would change dramatically soon enough and he had to seal this deal if they could keep going even remotely as they had. In the back of his mind, deep from his consciousness, he prayed to Dad it would work.

The second both of them were in the house and headed towards the bar, a heavy book set was flung at their heads. Lucifer ducked in surprise but still managed to get hit with one of them lightly. John behind him wasn’t so lucky. “Zee! What the hell?!”

An enraged magician used her magic to have those same books slap at Constantine as she yelled at him. “You never told me this place was made by the DEVIL! How dare you! To just push this on me! As a THANK YOU?! YOU ASS!”

“Now now! To be fair,” Lucifer jumped in, trying to talk the irate magician down, “I may have made the place, but it was never with the intention to control it. I just come by to get drunk and store items I collect. You have free access to everything I put here and I only pop in every other decade.”

“It’s still a deal with the DEVIL!” Books returned to attacking Lucifer, who blocked his faces as much as possible. Compared to her other spells, this was a rather effective method of detouring intruders. “I’m not selling my soul to -”

“Stop being an idiot, Zatanna! He doesn’t buy souls!” John glared over to the woman, actually offended by the situation.

“What he said!” Lucifer jumped in.

“Demons do!”

“That’s up for debate.”

“You’re fine!”

“It’s just a house!”

“SCREW BOTH OF YOU!” Zatanna spouted off something too fast for either of them to catch, causing more mundane things in the house to fly at them. Instinctively, Lucifer’s wings popped out and shielded himself before he could gather his wits about him.

“THAT’S IT! **STOP!** ”

  
  


Every nonliving thing froze in the air of the house, letting the two humans just stare at the world around them. John poking one of the books that were just assaulting him proved Amenadiel didn’t just paused time for them. The book refused to budge. Lucifer let out a long sigh before giving another order. “ **Back in your places! Now!** ”

Every item flew backward and exactly where they came from without complaint or whisper. Every spell Zatanna cast in the past few minutes crumbled before her, and when Lucifer was certain not a single thing was out of place, he turned to her with a small scowl. “I am trying to be considerate, Miss Zatara, but if you cannot treat your landlord with some respect, I may have to return stewardship to a previous tenant, and you will be barred from the building. Are we clear?”

The woman watched him for a minute in silence, her face conflicted between an angry red and a fearful white. As charming as that would be, she was getting on his nerves by stalling his talk with John. Truthfully, he did not want to force anyone to switch owners of the place. Too much work and so long as the owner didn’t abuse his things, he didn’t care who was there.

“I’m not selling my soul.”

That ridiculous notion. “I don’t want it. What I want, is a drink. If you don’t mind.”

Lucifer gave her quick, strained smile, controlling his temper just enough to prove he was a civil devil. The woman seemed unimpressed but did nothing to stop him as he strode past her, folding his wings away. John followed a little slower than him, stopping next to her for a moment. “Zee -”

“Save it.”

“He’s actually -”

“I said,” bite and a glare snapped at the man, “save it. We’ll talk later. Go drink with the Devil.”

Constantine closed his mouth and grimly as he made his way to the house bar, two glasses already ready for them and Black Orchid waiting behind it with the bottle in her hands. Lucifer was already gulping down one of them, settling his nerves as John sat on the stool next to his. He took one sip and privately agreed this was some damn fine brandy.

The Devil never lied.

“Alright, Luci. What do you really want?”

Lucifer settled the glass down on a napkin, his face serious. “Not her soul, nor the house. No offense, darling.”

Orchid just nodded slowly. Zatanna stood at the edge of their view, arms folded and watching them carefully. She didn’t trust either of them for a second. Neither of them could blame her. “Then what? What would you, the King of Hell, sacrifice a lovely brandy on me for?”

The Immortal didn’t answer at first, instead watching his glass carefully. John raised an eyebrow. “Is Mazikeen in trouble again?”

“No, Maze is fine. It’s… someone else. Someone that… if anyone can connect me to… at least outside normal means…” He sighed heavily and ran a hand over his face. Why was this so damn hard?

“There’s a woman. One I deeply care about.”

“Ah. The Devil desires a girl.” John took a quick drink, ready to refute the man immediately as he put the glass down for a refill. “I don’t play matchmaker.”

“The match is already made.” Lucifer turned his ring on his hand once before glancing at him and towards the mostly empty liquor shelves before him. “Dad made a miracle and put her in my path. My powers have no effect on her. We became friends long before we became lovers, and that was a long and dangerous path with a lot of setbacks. You wouldn’t believe how many times I tried to keep us as just friends. To get her out of the limelight. I didn’t want it to be anything but real. We only admitted our mutual feels after I decided to return to Hell.”

“She knows you’re the Devil?”

He nodded.

John gave a long whistle as he brought the drink back to his lips. “And she _still_ likes you?”

He nodded again, smiling softly. “It was a hard road. And it made us aware of the eyes on us.”

Lucifer stopped there, remembering all the trouble started by Kinley and of all the women screaming his name in rage. Those ideologues had to have some kind of means to find them before they could give birth. He had to stop them. Somehow.

“Leaving her and staying in Hell would get them all off your back.”

He huffed out a humorless laugh. “Thought of that, but it’s too late if I did something like that now. Besides, after all the work I put into getting out of there this time, I’m not about to back down.”

Constantine raised an eyebrow at him. “Yeah… how are you doing your job and up here? Doesn’t make sense.”

He rubbed his eyes, tired of explaining it to others. “I made arrangements between myself and my siblings. I return every six days and spend one Earth day there. The rest of the week, a different angel watches over them. I have over sixty siblings trading off with me, and they only spend a day there at a time. Been working for over a year now.”

The mortal eyed him carefully. “One day still feels like an eternity there though.”

“Yes.”

John whistled again and took another sip. Talk about an arrangement. Sharing the load and making amends. “Didn’t know Heaven made peace with Hell.”

“More like siblings making peace with each other. Dad hasn’t objected and the demons are under control. Mostly.” Neither could deny the leaks John dealt with daily, but the fact things had quieted down over the past few years was undeniable. For nearly eight years it was a never-ending round of demonic interference on different Earths. Now it was a rare sighing with a lot of scheming behind it. “Still working on a few projects and filtering through small problems. Keeps me busy and you in the black up here.

“But no amount of doing my job will satisfy these mortals I need help with.” Back on track. “They are insane and have resorted to murder just to protect their ideals. I need a way to protect her. And her child. Without them connecting her to me.”

Child.

John Constantine stopped drinking, eyeing the Devil with dread. A woman and her child. He put his glass down with a loud thud. “I am not protecting the Anti-Christ.”

“John -”

“No. You knocked up some wench and expect me to protect the forerunner of the apocalypse? No way in HELL!” Fire blazed in his eyes as he shouted at the fallen angel. “I fought tooth and nail for the multiverse to exist and you want me to protect the one who will destroy it? Never!”

“Bloody hell! It’s not the Anti-Christ!” The glass he held shattered as his hellfire eyes flashed at him. If John hadn’t seen it before, his heart may have stopped. Instead, the mortal got to his feet and pointed at the Devil before him.

“Bullshit and you know it! You just don’t want your ‘precious baby’ dead!”

“That part we can agree on!” Lucifer slammed his hand onto the counter as he got to his feet. Neither man noticed his hands becoming red and clawed, nor how they shook ever so slightly. “I’m terrified of these people killing them! Do you have any idea how many women they’ve killed because of such a ridiculous notion?”

“Your kid,” John poked his chest harshly, glaring up into his eyes defiantly, “is the Anti-Christ! Of course people want it dead!”

“But Chloe shouldn’t die because I screwed up!” The Devil didn’t waver. He had to protect her! “She’s an innocent! A miracle! She shouldn’t be punished!”

“Then you shouldn’t have SCREWED HER!”

“Well it’s too late now!” Lucifer turned around and marked the length of the bar before turning back to him, hand going down his face in exasperation. “I screwed up! I get it! But I can’t let her die for my mistakes!”

“What? So you need a way to abort the Anti-Christ? Without killing Mummy?” Constantine spotted the redness growing on the man’s hands but ignored it. The coming apocalypse was a little more important right then.

“It’s not the -” He stopped, spotting his hand and closed his eyes, taking a slow breath before trying to answer rationally. “As much as I would support that, she’d never agree to it. And I doubt a baby my _father_ actually let happen like this could be aborted so easily. There is no celestial after pill.”

“We’ll see.”

“No! No, you will not.” The red on his hands receded momentarily until John made that comment. Lucifer shook a little as he took another slow breath, forcing himself to calm down. “Just… Just go meet her. Do whatever test you want to prove my story. See for yourself that this spawn will NOT end the worlds. See for yourself, learn what you need to about Chloe to prove I’m right. Then… then make your decision.

“To protect her and her child’s life, I am willing to do anything in my power.”

John Constantine watched the Devil for a long while, silent and considering. Lucifer was offering him another blank check, one bigger than the previous one, just to save one woman and his seed within her. It’d be sweet and endearing if the kid wasn’t going to be the bloody Anti-Christ! Still, he didn’t try to seal the deal with a drink or without knowing all the details.

Lucifer didn’t lie.

This lassie must be pretty damn important to him.

Damn. The brandy managed to put a doubt in his head.

He cocked his head to the side. “Your backdoor still open?”

“Unlocked. Right around the corner.” Lucifer gestured to the right, his shaking calming down a little. To think the Devil could tremble. “Maze and Amenadiel are with her. Everyone there knows the truth.”

“John…”

Constantine raised a hand to Zatanna’s warning voice, keeping his eye on the Devil. “Risking a lot on a maybe.”

The Devil gave him a grim smile. “I may not be the best judge of character, but I believe I know yours. I trust you to make the best decision for everyone. I’ll stay here until you return. Keep the connection open. No harm will come to anyone while I am in this house. You have my word.”

“Hm.” John eyed him for a moment more before going towards the backdoor. He spotted the Devil hands turning back into human ones as he turned the corner, momentarily wondering what afflicted the immortal to constantly changing back and forth like this. He put that question in the back of his mind as he came across the door he could have sworn was just a blank wall for years. He grasped the iron knob and pulled it open to see a fractured image of a high scale apartment. Taking a breath, he forced his way through to the other world and where the Devil dwelled when he wasn’t in Hell.

The first thing he noticed once the sensation of going between worlds via lay-lines left him was the big black man glaring him down. He gave him a grin. “Celestial energy, hostile glare, you must be Amenadiel.”

“Are you the one Lucifer had to meet?” Amenadiel’s glare didn’t let up, eyeing him slowly.

“Seems so.”

“Constantine?”

He peered around the large celestial wall-man before him to the voice he recognized and grinned broader. “Mazikeen! Nice to see you!”

The demon whose skin he saved (quite literally) almost gaped at him in shock before she scoffed and shook her head. “He’s the one, Amenadiel. Figures Lucifer would talk to him.”

“What? No ‘Hello, John. How are you’?” His whit only gained him a glare.

A large hand clapped on his shoulder, making him look up to the imposing man. “You try anything, _anything_ , meant to harm them, I will personally take you to Hell.”

His smile diminished. “Right. I don’t get to kill the Anti-Christ.”

“It’s not the Anti-Christ!”

John almost jumped out of his skin at the two’s united shot. Looking between them, his doubts grew. An angel, a demon, and the Devil, all said this kid wasn’t the bringer of the apocalypse. Did they know something he didn’t?

“Got it. Can I meet this little ‘miracle’ now?”

The two exchanged looks, then Amenadiel stepped to the side, still guarding the door. He gave the man another sweet smile, knowing it didn’t make himself look charming in the slightest but it didn’t hurt to try. He looked around the main body of the apartment and spotted three ladies and a toddler talking just out of range. He made his way towards them and couldn’t help but smile at their very domestic conversation: homework, school, and ‘little Charlie’ getting into trouble. Getting closer, he tried to figure out which one was the woman in question and easily spotted the right one. Lucifer wasn’t into kids and the other was the toddler’s mum. This… Chloe… turned her head and spotted him fairly easily, starting to get up. She seemed to look past him for a second before nodding and making eye contact.

He gave her a small smile and offered her his hand over the couch. “I assume you’re Chloe? Lucifer’s lover?”

Chloe’s cheeks turned a shade pinker but she kept eye contact. Brave. She took his hand. “Detective Chloe Decker, LAPD. And you are?”

“John Constantine. Paranormal detective. Hm. I’m surprised he’d go for someone in law enforcement.”

“Don’t overthink it.” She waved a hand towards another room. The bedroom in fact, and it didn’t have a door. He raised an eyebrow at her, wondering what she was implying. “Would you like to talk privately? I’m afraid there aren’t very many doors here and I doubt you’d want to talk in the shower.”

John nodded his head towards the balcony. “Somewhere sunny would be better. And your bodyguards would be able to see easier over there.”

Chloe looked over to Maze and Amenadiel, smiling slightly at the idea before nodding. She ran a hand over the barely teenaged girl doing her homework as she made her way to the balcony. “I’ll be back in a few minutes, Monkey.”

“Just don’t cheat on Lucifer!” The teasing tone of her voice got a chuckle and small shove from her mother. John raised an eyebrow at the casual joke as he followed her to their private chat. How comfortable was this kid with the King of Hell? All of them seemed far too comfortable there. The other lady, the mother to the toddler, eyed him knowingly. Strangely, it was her gaze on him that unnerved him. Not a demon’s, not an angel’s, but a mum of a toddler.

What kind of people did Lucifer surround himself with?

Outside, they closed the door for a semblance of privacy. He opened his mouth to lay into the chick but she beat him to it. “Okay, I know Lucifer asked you here to somehow make everything all better, but before you get all preachy about how I shouldn’t have slept with the Devil and I’m going to Hell for having his kid, know that I spent five years, _five freakin’ years_ , as his friend before we ever went to bed together. He’s been my partner on over a hundred murder cases and I know full well how childish, hot-tempered, perverted, egotistical, and selfish he can be. But he’s always had my back, supported me even when we disagreed, forgiving and repentant, giving like you wouldn’t believe, and gentle with everyone he cares about. He has his faults, and a lot of issues – which he’s working on and that’s great, don’t knock it – but he’s also a good man. He’s great with Trixie and Charlie, and even went back to Hell just to protect everyone. He’d rather sacrifice himself over and over again than see us hurt, and he has. He’s died _twice_ to save me, killed his own _brother_ to save me and his mom, and the _only_ reason he has his ‘devil face’ now is because he killed a man determined to destroy everyone and everything he loved. His sense of justice is so strong, he has to get the right person on our cases, and each one is personal for him.

“So whatever you’re planning, for me, our kid, or him? It’d better be good for everyone or you won’t have to worry about Maze or Amenadiel. _I_ will shoot you right off this balcony.”

Stunned, John just noted the gun at her hip before taking a step back and letting out a short laugh. “I see why he likes you.”

Chloe kept her trained eye on him, reminding him very strongly of people he met over the past few years and saved the multiverse with. He shook his head and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I’m not planning anything, love. Just a few tests. He’s right. You shouldn’t die because he screwed up.”

“Damn right.”

Reaching into his coat pockets, he decided on a few light questions. “Didn’t you have some kind of contraceptive?”

“Yeah. We did.” She shook her head, her stance relaxing a little. He must have passed her test. “I was on the pill and he had a condom. Something must have not worked.”

“That or his dad wanted it.” He took out a celestial iron rosary, eyeing her again. She was a miracle, right?

She hesitated. “The thought had crossed our minds. Just don’t tell him that. He’s very touchy about his dad’s interference.”

“No doubt. Hold this a sec.” John plopped the necklace into her hand and waited for a reaction. Nothing. “Huh.”

“Huh what?”

He didn’t answer and just took the rosary out of her hand and pressed it lightly to her belly. Still no reaction. “Huh!”

“Huh what?” Confusion ruled her face, starting to get annoyed.

“Nothing.” No reaction. None at all. That rosary would burn Mazikeen and send her screaming. Constantine put the rosary away and took out a blank card. “Hold this for a minute.”

Confused, Chloe took the card and held it as he dug something else from his pockets. “What are you doing?”

“Just a few tests. Don’t worry, love. No reaction is a good reaction. Now hold still.” He took out a portable incense burner and got it working, smoke starting to flow out of it. He circled her once, said a few well-chosen Latin phrases in key points, and stopped where he started, waiting for a reaction.

Absolutely nothing. She just looked around and at him, confused. He cocked his head to the side, a small smile on his face. “Feeling any different?”

“No. What did you say your job was?”

“Paranormal detective. Bit of a jack-of-all-trades actually, but I mostly just deal with the weird and creepy.” He snuffed out the burner and put it away, smirking to himself. This was really interesting.

“Was that supposed to smell like something?” Chloe pointed to the pocket he put the burner in, getting more confused by the second. John couldn’t stop the laugh.

“Not to humans. May want to stay away from Maze though until you get a shower. Can I have that card back?” Quietly she gave it back and he took a good hard look at the image, his smile growing. Everything was starting to make sense. “Thank you. I think I’m about done here.”

Things didn’t quite settle with the woman. “That’s it? That’s all you’re going to do?”

“For now.” Constantine nodded to himself, putting all the facts in place in his head. This was quite the development. “I have my answers, and now I need to go home and make a choice. Nice meeting you, Detective Chloe Decker.”

He offered his hand again and she took it, giving him a firm if confused shake. “Nice… meeting you too, Mr. Constantine.”

He gave her one more smirk before letting go and heading back inside. Chloe followed after, watching him in confusion as he walked towards an opened bookcase. John enjoyed the look of disgust on Mazikeen’s face as he passed her. “UHG! Did you have to – DECKER! You need a shower asap!”

“I think it smells heavenly,” Amenadiel jabbed back, actually smiling now.

“You would!”

“Bye.” John did not wait for one of them to accost him but pushed through the house’s back door and back into his Earth. Shaking off the aftereffect of transversing worlds, he made his way casually over to the bar the Devil waited. Lucifer held a new glass in his hand, pointedly ignoring the agitated Zatanna watching him and the doorway. He saw her shoulders lose some tension but she didn’t relax at all. Nor would she until the Devil was out of her house.

John sat back on his stool and picked up his glass, taking a small sip. The man next to him cringed slightly. “Did you have to use that incense?”

“Did you want me to confirm your kid was not the Anti-Christ?” He smirked at the Devil from the corner of his eye. The man shook his head, but he could see the relief coming from him. His hands were almost human again. John put the glass back down. “You’re right. She doesn’t deserve to die. Neither does the kid.”

“John…”

“She’s his Persephone.” He whipped out the card he had Chloe hold a little while ago and threw it at Zatanna. She caught it easily and gaped at the image: a beautiful woman with two sides, warm fertile spring and a cold judging queen in darkness. “No kid between them would be the Anti-Christ. If anything, it’ll be a balancing force in favor of humanity.”

“Seriously?” Lucifer looked over him in wonder. The thought hadn’t come to him before and it was a bit of a delight to hear. To think he brought comfort to the King of Hell.

“You used a destiny card?” Zatanna’s bewilderment made him smile. John shrugged.

“Only way to be certain.” He took another sip of his brandy, his thoughts coming together. Now he knew what was up, he had to figure out his next steps.

“So… will you take my offer? Will you help me protect her?” Some hope and desperation entered Lucifer’s voice. He must truly be at whit’s end if he made this plea.

“Not so fast.” The Devil stilled beside him, red returning to his hands. “I don’t even know if I can.”

“John -”

“If I can’t make a guarantee, you shouldn’t make the deal.” That got the man… no, the desperate soon to be father… to shut up. John put the glass down, letting out a long breath. “Your best scotch. For looking into a surefire protection for your Persephone and offspring with her. I may need to bring others into the search and even casting. When I have an answer, a guaranteed protection, I’ll pray to you and you open the door again with your earlier offer.

“Deal?”

John Constantine turned and stared down the Devil, Lucifer Morningstar, with his hand extended. The man looked into his very human eyes and he could see the hope rising in both of them. Two human hands grasped each other, a small pulse going through the two of them.

“Deal.”

–

Zatanna watched her ex coldly as he fingered the two bottles of the finest scotch and brandy the Devil could afford. To think he’d make deals over something so trivial. “What are you planning, John? You can’t seriously be thinking of saving the Devil’s kid.”

“Every kid deserves a chance. Especially when God has a say in their conception.” He took one last swig of his drink, smirking at how fast the Devil ran to get the second bottle. “You’ll change your tune when you meet the mother.”

“John -”

“We don’t have a lot of time, Zee.” He got off his stool and grinned at the challenge. “Let’s pray God’s on our side in this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Placed more in Lucifer's timeline than the rest of the DC multiverse, but definitely after Crisis. I've only seen clips from Crisis so if you know how to adapt John's speech patterns, please tell me. No I haven't seen the show but this is also a little in the animated and comics worlds as well. Piecing it together here. ^^;  
> Hope you liked it. John and Zee will come back in another chapter, with a few others. In a much shorter chapter.


	3. Four Deals and a Spell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Co cast a spell.

* * *

_Lucifer. We’re here and ready with a way._

Within minutes of John Constantine’s short prayer, a door appeared on a normally vacant wall in the House of Mysteries. It burned for a second then flew open, a fractured image of an apartment on the other side. The man smirked then waved the others through after him. The Devil was eager.

The second he was through the doorway, John’s shoulder was grabbed by a frantic fallen angel. “You did it? You found a way to protect her?”

“What? No, ‘Hi! How’ve you been, Johnny? Been a few weeks! I missed you’?” He tried to grin at the Devil before him but there was no humor in Lucifer’s eyes. Instead, there was strain and fire. And instantly sarcasm.

“Yes! A few weeks! A few weeks of not knowing if some nut job would wander into my club, plant a bomb, and blow everyone sky high just because they caught wind of a spawn being produced! I told you we didn’t have a lot of time!”

“I could just leave.” He thumbed over to the door where his companions just made it through, either looking around impressed or glaring at their altercation. “Since you clearly don’t need me. I only promised to look after all.”

John turned to leave, knowing the Devil couldn’t stop him, only for the same man to grab his shoulder again, trembling slightly. His hand was scaly and red again. He was starting to see a pattern here. “No! No… My apologies. It’s just… It’s been a stressful few days. Please, come in. Tell me what you have planned. Does anyone need a drink?”

Lucifer looked over the rest of his group, small and dependable. Zatanna was there under protest, but she was one of the best when it came to incantations so she had to come. Jason Blood watched the King of Hell with more thoughts than were probably wise; the man would be most useful in balancing the powers necessary and was the one who found the spell in his private collection. Dan Cassidy, on the other hand, was there as a spell component; it always helped to have a demon with a soul on these kinds of spells. Hopefully, Chloe wouldn’t freak out at a ‘blue devil’ in the room. Then again she bed the actual thing so this really wouldn’t be a shock to her.

“I could use one,” Cassidy piped in, yellow teeth flashing.

Lucifer locked eyes with him before closing his eyes, some kind of strain pulsating on his face. He took in a breath before saying a word more. “Who changed you?”

The Blue Devil stopped for a moment before answering. “The demon Neron.”

“Ah. Always a trouble maker. I’ll deal with him next chance I get. Now, a drink. While you explain everything to me. Jason. Zatanna.” He nodded to the other two, not asking any questions, before going to his private bar and taking down a few options. “Still prefer whiskey, Jason? Pretty sure all the young lady drinks is Rose. And you? Blue one?”

“Dan Cassidy,” he answered. “I like bourbon.”

“Great.”

“I’m not drinking anything,” Zatanna butted in while Blood shook his head.

“Water only for me. Need a clear head for the spell.”

“Sadly.” John put a book on the counter and flipped to the pages they needed. “It’s rather complicated but it should keep her invisible in all ways from those who wish her harm. Her and any offspring the two of you have.”

Lucifer raised his eyebrows as he passed a tumbler to Cassidy. “A spell triggered by intent. I’m impressed. Easier to see who your enemies are. And it won’t disappear if she defends herself?”

“She can shoot people off balconies if they want her dead. Even walk right up to them in broad daylight and slice their bellies open.” Constantine shook his head ruefully. “She won’t be invulnerable, but it will throw off her enemies. It’s permanent too. So long as she lives, no enemy will be able to find her. Same for the kids.”

“There’s just going to be the one.”

He couldn’t help the fine smile on his lips as the Devil sipped from a glass. “If you say so.”

Judging by the growing redness on the man’s forearms, Lucifer did not like the teasing. Taking a breath, he looked over the group and smiled. “Right. Now, as for payment, John has a check he’ll cash in later. What about the rest of you? What is it you want for this?”

Jason Blood spoke up first. “Volume three of Freist’s spells.”

Dan Cassidy next. “I want to walk down the street like a normal person but not lose my powers.”

“I want you no longer associated with the House of Mysteries.” Zatanna’s demand came last and with a glare. One-track mind this one.

Lucifer took a long sip before pointing to each one in succession. “Yes, yes, and can’t. I do that, the house is gone. Think hard for something else. Something you truly desire.

“The book’s in the loft up there,” he pointed towards his much smaller library just out of view. For a party guy, he sure had a lot of books. “I think it’s next to Chaucer’s lost rough drafts and my mangled copy of Dante’s Paradisio. Rubbish, both of them, but at least Chaucer had some decent ideas. Not sure if it’ll actually help you though. Rather dry for my tastes.

“As for you,” he pointed to Cassidy and grinned, “I know exactly what you need and I think I have one in my jewelry box. Give me a minute.”

He set his glass down before heading towards his room and then out of sight to a closet. John briefly followed his path with his eyes before stopping at the bed. Looked like someone was in it, resting. Concern started to build within him. Was there really a bomb scare? Was that the reason Chloe was in his bed, napping? What happened in those three weeks? John didn’t have long to debate because Lucifer came back with a simple ring, handing it to Cassidy.

“Prick your finger here,” he pointed to a clear stone on it, “and put it on the same finger. When you wear it, you will look the same as when you were strictly human, aging included. When you take it off, you will, well, obviously. The spell’s continual as long as it’s on the same finger as you pricked it. Also takes care of footprints and horns. One person use. When you die, it will crumble to ash. So only die once.”

He handed the ring over to him before grumbling. “Can’t believe I have to bloody well say that. Heard quite a lot of you make a holiday out of death. Rey-Rey’s gone into fits about that. And you, Miss Zatara? Have you figured out what you want?”

The woman just glared at him. Blood already ditched them in favor of the ‘lost book’ he wanted and Dan clearly loved the ring. “I don’t want anything you can give.”

“Oh come now! Please, tell me.” Lucifer leaned in over the counter, smiling almost devilishly at her. John knew what was coming but couldn’t get up in time to stop anything. “What is it you desire?”

“Luci-”

“I want my father back.”

The Devil backed off, a little less than pleased. “Oh. Well, if it’s any assurance, I’ve never met him.”

“He’s...missing.” Zatanna snapped out of her trance and glared at him. “You bastard.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, my dear.” He put on a grin but anyone who paid attention could tell it was forced. Even himself. Lucifer slapped the counter lightly before coming up with something. “Well, I may not be able to give him to you, but I can get you in the right direction. There’s a hand mirror in the house, put it there a few centuries ago. Bronze handle, carvings of eyes on it, and I think the glass broke when I plopped it in there. Third floor, grey door. It allows you to see whomever you want regardless of whether they’re alive or dead, and get to talk to them if you can convince them you aren’t Dad. Just don’t have it face another mirror or you’ll release one of Abaddon’s favorite minions. Unless you want destruction and decay running rampaged in your world that is. Highly don’t recommend it.”

“A hand mirror? With a demon inside?”

“It’s… not quite a demon.” He cringed at some memory but shook it off. “They’re not fond of my insane brother. But the minion would do everything to release him and I won’t have it. The Devil does have rules. My advice? Keep it in that room. There aren’t any other mirrors there.”

“Are there any other demons you’re hiding in the house?” John raised an eyebrow at him and got a shrug back.

“Not so much hiding as making sure their friends can’t release them. More fine print found in the deed, love.” Lucifer gave a small smile to Zatanna, trying to reassure her. “These special prisons are hidden in their own dimensions and all I did was hide some doorways in small objects no one should care about. Sealed books, mirrors, pictures, tapestries… I think I have a flower display in the hall containing an ‘eldritch horror’. The house takes care of them and so long as people leave them alone everything’s fine.”

Zatanna took a slow pained breath. “That explains so much.”

The Devil eyed her for a second. “Is that one still around?”

“No.”

“Ah. Shame.” He looked to the side, annoyed. “That was a good vase.”

“You really shouldn’t leave important doorways lying around the house,” John chided. Lucifer shrugged.

“Can’t leave them in Hell either, and without the doorways, there are no prisons. At least there they can be protected and thought of as ordinary objects no one cares to play with. Sorry for the inconvenience,” he told Zatanna, “but it’s a far cry better than the alternative. Everything is in the fine print.”

The woman’s eyes narrowed on him. “Do you regularly add to that?”

“No. Jerahmiel is the one who finalized it.” Lucifer picked his glass back up and took a quick sip. “Bit of an ass but he does have better forethought than I did. Having an extra depository for doorways is quite useful.

“Now, about this spell of yours.” He set his glass down and looked back to Constantine, a small fire in his eyes. The red on his hands had receded somewhat as they talked but it was still there. He smiled, ignoring it as he gave him his full attention. “What do you need to perform it?”

“We have everything we need on us, except a drop of both of you two’s blood for the ink.” John passed the book over to him, letting him read the fine details himself as the mortal watched him. The redness continued to recede and the fire in his eyes diminished. It was odd how he seemed to fluctuate so much, in far less control than the first time he met the guy. But in a way, he seemed much more… tolerable. Agreeable. Human. Less of an ass at least. “Pretty sure we can do the spell here.”

“Agreed. We’ll need to move the furniture for a bit but that won’t be a problem.” Lucifer finished going over it and nodded. It was a good plan. He put his glass back down and made his way around his bar towards his room. “Alright, start moving things and I’ll join you in a bit. I need to explain everything to the Detective.”

“She under house arrest?” John raised an eyebrow, watching him go. The devil shook his head, his voice low to not disturb her.

“Fainted at a crime scene. Haven’t gone to a doctor yet, not until we can be certain they won’t try to kill her.” The redness came back up his arms as he left his guests to themselves. John just watched for a moment longer, considering the information. He could feel Zatanna and Dan watching as well, one annoyed and the other curious. The Devil likely didn’t care for the audience, but it was just too interesting not to watch, just a little. No one expected him to very gently wake the woman up and start speaking with her in such quiet tones.

John looked away, knowing he shouldn’t be part of this bit. “C’mon, Dan. We’ve got some couches to move.”

“Right…” The two men turned away and started getting the place set up, letting their very reluctant, token female learn, just a little, that the Devil had a very soft side.

* * *

“You’re gonna have to strip, love.”

Chloe’s face fell into disbelief meant only for Lucifer. An edge and a warning entered her voice. “What?”

John gave her a cheeky grin. “We need access to your womb.”

She took a rather slow breath, her face pained as if she had a migraine. “Explain, but in less perverted ways.”

“We need to put this diagram over the uterus so the spell can reach the baby.” Zatanna’s explanation cut the boys’ fun short. “Essentially, your reproductive organs are the center of the spell and anything that comes out of it connected to him,” she glared slightly at Lucifer, “will have the same protection. So you need to clear that area of anything that would smudge the spell, and it has to be on skin or it won’t work.”

“Spoilsport.”

“So I’m fine if I just take off one layer then?” Chloe looked between them all, glaring a little harder at Constantine and Lucifer, who hadn’t said a word against or for this the entire time. She jutted her jaw. “You wanted to see me naked.”

“Still my favorite film.”

“Not a good enough defense.”

“Not a lie either.” The inside joke banter flew over the couple’s audience’s heads by miles, but was kind of adorable. Most of the spell was set up perfectly and the components in place. All they needed now was to draw the same diagram on Chloe’s belly, have her lay down in the center, and then they could cast the spell. Once the ink disappeared, it was done and they could all go their separate ways. Shouldn’t take much longer, but the main part of the spell was flirting with her mate.

“Flirt later,” Zatanna butted in, more annoyed by the second. “Spell now. Just lose the shirt and unbutton your pants for a bit.”

“John’s right. You’re really a spoilsport.” The Devil pouted. Constantine wanted to take a picture just to laugh at his face whenever he felt a little blue, but that’d be using up his meal ticket; no way he was going to pass on this deal for something juvenile. The Devil puffed out a sigh and looked to his love. “Well, best get this done. Allow me.”

“No, I can undress myself, thanks.” The Devil pouted even more as Chloe unbuttoned the bottom of her – more like Lucifer’s – shirt and loosened her pants a bit before looking around for a place to get drawn on. “Where do you want me?”

“Center of the circle,” Jason Blood piped in, getting them all on track again. Dan just hung back awkwardly, useless for anything but the spell itself, while John finished putting other components of the spell in place. Zee kept Lucifer out of the circle while Blood guided her there and laid her down without mucking it up. Once Chloe was comfortable, they cleared her belly again and she did her best to stay still while the ancient knight drew a near replica of the circle on her with the soft end of a dove’s feather.

Tried.

The giggles came whether she liked it or not.

Jason sighed. “Please, stay still.”

“It tickles!”

“Oh is this a new fetish I’m seeing?” Lucifer peeked over to them, grinning to himself as he watched. “I’ll have to remember this for later.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“But my dear detective! I have to give you the most pleasure possible!” Their teasing only brought more mirth to his eyes, getting even shrewder glares from Zatanna. “Imagine what would happen to my reputation if anyone learned I hadn’t used all my skills to delight you!”

“Damn your ‘reputation’! You try to tickle me and I’ll shoot you!”

“Again? Or is this really what you tell people when you’re pregnant? Daniel had warned me -”

“I nearly shot him because he _wouldn’t_ stop fussing! Do you _want_ me to shoot you?”

“That depends on the ammo.”

The pained expression on her face started her seething. “I am not doing belly shot!”

“Could use whipped cream.”

“LUCIFER!”

“And done.” Jason lifted the feather away from her body, getting a double-take from the ladies in the room. Pleased, Blood stood up and bowed slightly to the irritating Devil. “Thank you for your assistance.”

“My pleasure.” Lucifer bowed just as much back, grinning impishly. “No better way to stop the giggles than a sound argument. Though I am looking forward to such fun after everything is handled. Eventually.”

Zatanna just gaped at him while his partner shook her head and raised and dropped her hands to the ground, exasperated. John barely suppressed a laugh into a chuckle, shaking his head as well. He looked over the diagram, making sure everything was in place before nodding and looking at the Devil. “We’re ready.”

“Right.” Lucifer swallowed something then walked around to the other side of his bar, soundly out of everyone’s way. Red crept up his neck, his eyes ablaze as he picked up his forgotten drink and took a sip, reassuring himself and other. “Shouldn’t take more than a tick, love. Spell set up is usually longer than the actual thing.”

“Just stay still until we’re done. You won’t feel a thing. Dan, over here.” Constantine waved the Blue Devil to a specific spot of the diagram while Zatanna and Blood moved to their spots. Once he was certain his colleague was in place and wouldn’t move, he stepped to his position and nodded to the others. It was time. “Let’s get this party started.”

All three spellcasters took a relaxing breath, centering themselves before Zatanna started chanting in a tongue humanity no longer recognized. Jason started his part of the spell two stanzas in, using an entirely different language but just as unrecognizable. John waited until the power surged between them into the circle before starting his part, all in ancient Hebrew and tying every inch of the spell together. The diagram below them glowed faintly and so did Chloe’s belly. A faint blue light, gentle as the sky, started filling the room, surrounding her and turning the ink below its shade. Dan also glowed with the light, along with the other artifacts composing the spell, startling him briefly but he stayed where he was. Their voices rang louder, a musical force surrounding their words and infecting the air as the symbols changed completely from ink to light.

Then the diagram around them started to shrink, focusing on Chloe. Like a zoom out function on a camera, the spell became smaller and smaller, slowly joining the one on her stomach. Their voices almost sounded like one voice as the light became part of her, her entire body glowing as its edges touched her. The glowing shrank on her as well, focusing only on its target the entire time. When the diagram beneath her matched the one on top, the second one started to shrink as well, the glow focusing on her womb almost sharply until it became a singular beam where her child lay dormant. Until -

_pop_

Like a drop into a lake, the light went out and a gentle ripple of it spread outward beyond the casters and the world outside, barely noticeable to those looking for it. Their words died out and everyone relaxed at last.

The spell was done.

“Wow...” Dan looked between all of them. “That… was cool.”

“I’ll say,” Chloe arched her neck back to see John. “Can I get up now?”

John barely nodded before Lucifer was at her side, red skin fading fast and a smile on his face. A real one. “Yeah. We’re done. Got a mortal enemy you want to test it on?”

“It’s working.” Lucifer helped Chloe to her feet, relief almost pouring out of him. “The ripple is touching humanity as we speak.”

“Wait, it’s affecting the entire _world_?” She narrowed her gaze on him, getting the Devil to raise a hand in his defense.

“Only in the same way Amenadiel’s powers stop time. You’re not invisible to everyone, just those who intend to hurt and kill you. It’s a defense, nothing more. There are no negative side effects to anyone.”

“Though if someone suddenly decides to kill you on the spot, they may go a little batty.” This gained John an annoyed glare from the Devil and an are-you-serious stare from his Persephone. He just grinned at them. “You’ll suddenly disappear on them. Better hope they don’t have itchy fingers.”

“I see…” She let out a soft sigh and shook her head. “Well, this does let us know who our friends are.”

“Indeed.”

“We should get going.” Zatanna’s voice brought them all back around, glaring still at the Devil, though not as harshly. “Not a good idea to leave doorways between worlds open.”

She thumbed over to the still-open door to the House of Mysteries. Jason Blood was already gathering the remnants of the spell and Dan was attempting to put the furniture back where it came from. It wouldn’t take long to clean up and if they missed anything extra, the Devil wouldn’t mind too much. John agreed, but he wasn’t quite done yet. “One minute. Luci and I have one last thing to talk about before I go.”

That earned him a curious look from the man himself. “I take it you’re speaking about your favor? Already decided to cash it in?”

“In a sense. Let’s talk while your lady love sets up a much-needed doctor’s appointment.” He waved over to the bar as a light sprung in Chloe’s eyes. She smiled, kissed Lucifer’s cheek, and immediately left the room to do exactly that. The Devil hesitated slightly, his body moving to go after her before pulling back and looking back to John, nodding resolutely. As they made their way to the bar, he could see the red still on his hands and wrists, but not near as bad as before. He had to get the full story on that one day, but he wasn’t sure how to bring it up. Either way, he knew one thing; Lucifer Morningstar was 100% wrapped around that one human’s finger and would follow her anywhere if she let him.

Nearly to the bar, Zatanna grabbed his arm, a worried warning on her face. “John, what are you planning?”

He gave her a soft smile, knowing she wouldn’t agree with what he was about to ask. Their time together was short, but he enjoyed every minute of it. He hoped this wouldn’t dampen his remaining days with her. “Don’t worry. There won’t be a fallout from this deal.”

Not entirely convinced, she let him go and he took up his earlier glass at the Devil’s personal bar. Lucifer already filled it again and sat at the stool next to his. Looking forward and not at him, the ‘scary monster’ gave a long sigh. “Alright, what is it that you desire?”

“A guarantee.”

“What?” That got the Devil to look at him, now thoroughly confused. John took a long sip of his drink before starting his prepared speech and thoughts. All or nothing now.

“I have no illusions of where I’ll go when I die. Heaven sounds boring anyway and I’m rather fond of my memories so no Purgatory for me. You won’t see me in Limbo either. I’m willing to bet there’s a room already waiting for me in Hell, with my many sins etched onto the door and a line of eager demons waiting to torture me for all of eternity for all I’ve done to them.”

He took another long sip, shaking slightly at the thought of his inevitable death and afterlife. Lucifer didn’t try to deny it and from his reflection, John could see the resolution and sadness in his demeanor. He probably already saw the door. John set his glass back down. “So, what I want you to do, is… when I die, get me out of my hell loop and make sure the demons can’t torture me. I’ll still be there, but… I don’t want to be reminded of my wrongdoings or gutted by my enemies forever.”

Lucifer just watched him for a long, silent minute, contemplating the deal. “You do realize,” he started, very slowly, “that in order to do that, you would have to work for me for all of eternity.”

“Thought of that.”

“It’s never been done before. Successfully. With the being staying human. And in Hell.”

“Thought of that too.” Actually, he hadn’t. John was going out on a wild limb here.

Lucifer ran a hand over his face, shaking his head. “That was how four demons were made, John. Seven others attempted it and chose to go back into their loops instead. Two went to Purgatory and one to the Silver City.”

“Nice to know there’s a precedent.” It was, actually. He was open to the idea and it was possible. Just extremely difficult. And three people actually left Hell for good? That was saying something.

“It’s not an easy road, John.” There was almost a plea in his voice. “You will see things you never would want to see. Hear words you never would want to hear. The Lilim wouldn’t touch you but they can still make your life difficult. It’s lonely, dark, and treacherous there. You’re likely to go mad just wandering about.”

“Like you would if you didn’t have some vacation time?” He eyed the Devil from the side, fingering his glass. This was the reason Lucifer wandered the Earth from time to time in the past, and mostly stayed there now if he had a say in it. John suspected as much when they first met and knew it now more than ever. Earth time was his lifeline. He needed to wander in the past, and now he had a home to come back to.

Lucifer became silent again, watching him sadly. “The closest you’d get to vacation time is visiting one of the lighter hell loops.”

“I’ll take what I can get.” He finished his drink and looked to the man beside him. In this moment, he could actually see the King within him, contemplating his actions and words as he thought of what was and what will be. Nothing of the playboy devil before him, just a weathered man who wasn’t certain if this really was the best decision. “Lucifer, I don’t want Hell. No one does. But I know I’m going and I want to make the best of it. That’s my price for this. I’ve done my part. Now, time for yours.”

The King of Hell watched him in silence for a minute longer before letting out a defeated sigh. “Alright. When you die, I will go down there and pluck you out, lock your door, and mark you in my employ for the rest of eternity. Even if someone tries to take you back to life, you will remain one of mine forever. Whether your soul warps and you turn into a demon or you go mad from everything you see, is not under my control. Your eternal state is your own design, not mine. I have warned you of the consequences. Do you still want this?”

“Yes. I want this.”

They stared each other down for a minute before Lucifer extended his hand to him. “Well then, John Constantine, we have a deal.”

John pulled back his sleeve and grasped his forearm, locking the two of them together. Power served between them and the tie of this agreement cemented around them. “Deal. It’ll be a pleasure working with you, Lucifer Morningstar.”

“Likewise.”

“John,” Zatanna’s anxious voice bordered on fury nearby, “you just sold your soul to the Devil.”

“Better the Devil you know, am I right?” He grinned impishly before releasing the other man’s arm. His now very human arm. He’d have eternity to figure this guy out, no need to ask awkward questions right then.

“John –”

“I think we’ve overstayed our welcome, Zee.” John got off his stool and grabbed the book the spell was in, satisfied with the day’s activities. “Best we be off and let the happy couple get ready for the babe. Doctors’ appointments. Making the nursery. Lamaze classes. Announcements to make at long last. A gender reveal!”

Lucifer chuckled weakly. “Unfortunately the cat’s already out of the bag.”

“What?” Wasn’t it a little soon to know the gender of the kid? What about the doctor confirmation? Wasn’t that what was Chloe was setting up right then?

He let out a long, exhausted breath. “Everyone at the precinct knows she’s pregnant.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if John will come back in the story so just make it as you will. And I love making magic systems but I got the idea from more Arrowverse clips. Hope you liked the random name drops and references in DC land! Thank you wiki! =D
> 
> Comments make me happy. Please leave some. ^^V


	4. Elementary, Dear Detectives

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The LAPD finds out and the Lieutenant gives Lucifer an existential crisis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been a bit but I was having trouble finding a good transition from the opening scene to the scenes I really wanted to do. Two OCs introduced, but not as major players. enjoy!

* * *

_Earlier that week_

Lucifer would not let Chloe out of his sight. Well, he would if someone he trusted was with her. When out and about, Maze and Amenadiel were preferable options when he couldn’t be around, and in closed quarters he could rely on their human friends without doubt. Out in the field though? When Amenadiel was off negotiating and Maze taking care of other matters? Lucifer stuck to her side constantly.

It was so annoying!

“Lucifer, I am perfectly safe in the station,” she grumbled at her desk, rubbing her head instead of glaring at her partner. Said partner already replaced her usual coffee with a nutritious – and surprisingly tasty – tea, put a new chair at her desk others would be jealous of, and insisted she wears a bulletproof vest on at all times. Now she needed to go to the bathroom, fairly badly, because of all the liquids the same partner insisted she have, and he would not let her walk twenty feet to it alone! “What’s the likelihood I’ll be shanked in a police bathroom?”

“The fact there is a chance is reason enough to be careful.” Lucifer’s eyes darted around the room, the bathroom especially. Finally, a fellow officer left the bathroom and he nodded. “Okay, now is a good time. Shall we?”

She huffed at him and stood up at last, eager to empty her shrinking bladder. He offered his arm but she ignored it, opting for an iota of independence. Overprotective devil. Storming past him, Lucifer was stuck tailing her to no man’s land. It took her several harsh discussions to keep him out of the lady’s room (“No, you will not claim gender fluidity just to follow me in there, you pervert!”) and she was going to keep that ground she gained no matter what. Before closing the door, she sent the man a reminding glare and locked the door behind her. Lucifer’s back hitting the door, waiting and watchful, echoed through the five stall bathroom as she sighed. If she had to go through eight more months of this, she was going to go insane.

Shaking her head, Chloe relieved herself in the stall and made it to the sink before she could hear someone arguing with him on the other side of the door. Headache growing worse, she rushed through her hygiene routine and unlocked it, pulling the door back to see her partner trying to calm four irate ladies with guns at their sides. She offered them all a quick, apologetic smile before shoving her partner out of the way. “Sorry, this guy’s been a little crazier than usual lately. Last case kinda scrambled his brain.”

“It did not!” Lucifer’s protest would be comical if she and the others weren’t already pissed at him. Another hard shove got him moving and cleared the path for her coworkers, each with their own level of understanding. Two still glared at him as he continued to defend himself. “I’m just trying to protect you, Detective.”

“And as sweet as that is, there are limits. Get moving.” Why was he so difficult?

Lucifer pouted but did as she asked, returning to their respected chairs and back to their case. A paperboy got caught in the crossfire of either a gang war or a couple’s dispute, ending up dead on his route. That was the lead running theory but something about it didn’t seem quite right to her. The scenario didn’t match up very neatly in her head and she suspected it was just a facade for why the kid was really killed. There had to be more to -

Chloe’s thoughts stopped for a second as a wave of nausea hit her. Crap. She thought it was going to hit her in the evening! Quickly she covered her mouth and jerked her eyes to the bathroom. Lucifer spotted her movements and looked around in alarm. “Detective? What’s -”

No time to run.

She grabbed the trash can next to her and vomited her breakfast and snack into it. Lucifer stood instantly at her side, swiping her hair away and rubbing her back, his hands trembling slightly. Why did she have to throw up now?

Ears ringing and feeling a bit clammy, she didn’t hear or really sense anyone else near her desk as she tried to take slow, cleansing breaths. Having Lucifer there helped, but she could already tell their baby wasn’t done messing with her stomach. She nearly had her hearing back before she was gushing back into the can whatever was left over from the first round. Was there going to be a third?

Almost five minutes after the first sign, she settled back into her chair and noticed they were not alone. Ella sat on the ground next to her with her first aid kid, somewhat frantic. Dan stood on the other side of her desk, eyeing both her and Lucifer suspiciously. A few other officers in the area were also watching them awkwardly, wondering if they should do something or not. Likely the person on the phone two desks away was talking to the station medical professional. Their new Lieutenant was being waved over by another officer she barely knew. ‘Crap. Made a scene.’

“Chloe? Are you okay?” Ella’s concern and questions only made her feel all the more guilty for keeping everything a secret. “Are you sick? Did you hit your head? How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Ella, I’m fine. Just a stomach bug. It’ll pass.”

“Huh. Right.” Dan did not believe her and looked straight up to Lucifer, still rubbing her back and scouting the area from time to time. “Has she threatened to shoot you yet?”

“What?” That got the Devil’s attention and she could feel the tension in him immediately.

“Where did you eat? What did you eat? Oh my g- You need anything? I think I have some crackers in my locker. Wait, what did you eat last? Maybe it’s a food allergy.” Ella seemed to ignore the men above them, which was great. If she made the connection Dan did, they were done for.

“Pretty sure it’s not a food allergy.”

“Just that, around this time she started threatening to shoot me. Mostly when I hovered over her when she wasn’t throwing up.” Dan smirked at Lucifer, proud of the panic growing in his eyes no doubt. He started going back to his desk. “Got a lot worse at the end. Have fun with that.”

“I… wha… don…” Stuttering speechless Lucifer. Priceless.

“You never know! My aunt Raquel was fine one day and the next she couldn’t have bread anymore. Bread! Can you believe it? Who can live without bread!”

“Ella…” She had to come up with something or the forensics officer would work herself into a panic. Or worse, figure it out before they were ready to talk about it. “I’m fine. I just -”

“You’re not fine!” Her friend panicked loudly, drawing more eyes. “You’ve been acting weird for weeks! Both of you! You’re taking frequent trips to the bathroom -”

Dan returned with a fresh trashcan and a couple candy canes, still smirking. He knew exactly where this was going, the ass. Chloe exchanged cans silently as Ella rambled and gladly took the candy. She needed it, stat. And to brush her teeth. Ew.

“- coming in later, leaving earlier, eating differently, I can’t remember the last time you took a coffee -”

“Ella, I’m -” “Ms. Lopez, please -”

“- you missed tribe night, having headaches, took a break _and_ a nap, you let Lucifer drive – you _never_ let Lucifer drive! And he was driving slow! Slow! What the Hell! You two were always together before but now you’re always together! Like… like… handcuffs or something!”

“Helicopter already, huh?” Dan was enjoying this a little too much.

“What’s wrong, Chloe?” Ella was desperate for answers, worry ruling her face. “Are you sick? Are you dying?”

Chloe and Lucifer both shook their heads, the former answering. “No, I’m not. I’m fine, really. It’s nothing life-threatening.” She felt Lucifer’s grip tighten on her shoulder, remembering his concerns. To him, it was. She covered one of his hands with her own to calm him. “Just a stomach bug. I swear.”

“Is it really?” Ella moved her gaze away from her and to Lucifer. Lucifer, who did not lie. “Is Chloe really going to be okay?”

“Ah… ah… uhmm…”

Dan stifled a laugh. Petrified Lucifer must have looked hysterical. “Don’t worry about it, Ella. I’m certain everything is fine. And we’ll get a full explanation after this idiot gets over his… whatever. Right? Chlo?”

Chloe couldn’t answer simply or discreetly verbally, so she just gave him a strained ‘I will shoot you’ smile. It didn’t help with Ella though. “Wait… so you’re not sick?”

“No, I’m not. I’m fine.”

“But you just puked.” Confusion and worry warred over her thinking face. Oh no. This was not good. “You just puked… and the bathroom… and the diet… and the exhaustion…”

“Ella…”

“Not drinking… Lucifer’s hovering…”

“I don’t hover!” Lucifer objected.

“Yeah, you do,” Dan voiced Chloe’s counter.

“Dan gets it…” Ella’s eyes widened, reaching a conclusion. The excited smile on her face destroyed all the worry she had before. “Chloe! Are you pregnant?!”

Her voice carried across the entire floor and maybe to the floor below. If they didn’t have everyone’s attention yet, they sure did now. “Ella…”

“You are! You have to be! It all fits! That was morning sickness right now, wasn’t it!” She pointed to the can Dan had discreetly taken and tied off and kept on rambling. “Oh my g- It all fits! You’re pregnant! That’s awesome!”

Ella immediately dived in for a hug, nearly squeezing the life out of her in excitement. Then she gasped and leapt to her feet, letting go of Chloe. Her eyes latched onto the very stiff Lucifer behind the chair. “And you’re the dad! No wonder you’ve been so overprotective! Way to go Lucifer!”

“Ah!”

Ignoring all his discomfort, Ella threw herself around him and gave him a hug tighter than any he’d received from an adult. “You’re gonna be a daddy! Deckerstar baby! It’ll be so beautiful!”

She released him briefly, grinning like no tomorrow as she met his terrified stare. “You’re going to be a great dad, Lucifer. I just know it! And you’re going to love every moment of it.”

“Ah… aaahhh…” The Devil really couldn’t say a word. Chloe finally managed to get a good look at him and knew something was wrong. His face seemed drained of color and his eyes were blown wide, pupil dilated to their max. She looked to his stiff hands and saw they were starting to turn red. Right now it looked like eczema, but she knew his panic would make his hands less human by the second if they didn’t calm him down stat.

Ella also seemed to catch on. She blinked, her excitement fading a little. “Lucifer? Are you okay?”

“He’s still trying to get used to it. Lucifer, please sit down.” Chloe left her seat and all but forced her boyfriend to sit in it. She felt his trembling as she gently put his hands around himself, hiding their redness and giving him comfort at the same time. She rubbed up and down his arms, looking him in the eye and using soothing tones to help stop his panic attack. “It’s okay. Everything is going to be okay. I’m right here. We’re in a police station. It’s safe. We’re safe here. Just try to breathe.”

“I thought I was called up here for someone vomiting.” They looked behind them and saw Phil, their in house medic. He eyed the situation while carrying his large bag, a frown growing no his face. “This is a panic attack. Did he throw up?”

Chloe shook her head. “That was me. Lucifer’s just… being him. Do you have a shock blanket or an air tank?”

Phil put his bag on the ground and brought out both, immediately getting to work, but he still questioned Chloe. “So, do you know the cause of your vomiting?”

She swallowed briefly, about to answer, when Ella cut her off. “She’s pregnant. He’s the dad. And apparently he’s not really okay with it yet. Sorry.”

Chloe let out a small sigh. It really was inevitable that they’d all find out. She just wanted it on her terms and Lucifer just wanted to make sure she was protected first. All things considered, she couldn’t blame him for his behavior. She couldn’t fault Ella for her reactions either. Her headache was starting up again.

“Ah. First-time father, huh?” The paramedic just smiled, bringing the small air tank to Lucifer’s face. He spotted the man’s reddening hands and frowned. “Huh… that’s different.”

“Stressed induced eczema,” she lied. “It comes and goes.”

“Ah. I think I have something to help with that.” Phil’s hands went back into his bag at the same time someone else came to her desk. “So, is there a due date?”

“Um… we… haven’t been to a doctor yet.” Crap. She completely admitted she was pregnant to a virtual stranger. Chloe knew Phil in passing but not enough to meet up for drinks. Course he was treating a patient at the moment who was just panicking; maybe he was just trying to calm him down and not wheedle information that could be used against them. Damn. She was becoming paranoid too.

“Decker? Can I have a word with you?”

Everyone stilled at the new voice, the officers turning to it whether they wanted to or not. Behind them stood their (relatively) new lieutenant, Evan Taylor. A man of mixed heritage giving him dark skin and a large body, he was also known as ‘The Bear’. Hopefully he was a teddy today and not a grizzly. Looking at his eyes though, he meant business.

Chloe nodded and got to her feet. “Yes, sir.”

“In my office.”

She swallowed and nodded again. She ran a hand over Lucifer’s stiff shoulders and leaned down to his ear. “I’ll be in the Lieutenant's office for a few minutes. Stay put. I’ll be fine.”

He didn’t really respond, barely getting control of his breathing. She smirked and shook her head slightly. Overprotective almost all the time, and the second they’re exposed he freezes. Ella really did a number on him this time. Chloe took one of the candy canes Dan gave her earlier and unwrapped it as she followed her boss, mentally praying he was a teddy bear today and not an enraged grizzly who believed Lucifer’s kid was the Anti-Christ.

* * *

It took twenty minutes from the time Ella hugged Lucifer for his brain to finally return to the present. Everyone knew. Everyone knew! They knew Chloe was pregnant. They knew the baby was his. Everyone knew and they didn’t even have a defense yet! At any moment someone could shoot her dead and it would be entirely his fault! He wouldn’t be able to protect her for much longer! He had to do something, anything, to protect her! He couldn’t lose her! He couldn’t…

Where was Chloe?

Coming to himself, Lucifer jerked around, eyes wildly searching for the most precious creation in all of eternity. The paramedic in front of him said something as he jerked out of the mask, but he ignored him. He had to find -

“Cool it, Lucifer! Chloe’s with the Lieutenant in his office.”

Dan’s voice directed his eyes through several sheets of glass and straight to the object of his affections. Part of him relaxed, just seeing her in one piece nearby. Lt. Bear – for once he was not the originator of the nickname – was barely insight and not within arms reach of her while she stayed in view of everyone. Chloe wrung her hands as her superior talked to her every so often, biting her lower lip and looking down as she nodded slowly. Whatever the lieutenant was telling her, it worried her greatly. She said something on the other side of the glass and nodded one more time before opening the door and heading back his way.

Lucifer pushed up from the chair to get to her side faster, only for the paramedic and Dan to pull him back in. “Let go!”

“Lucifer, chill!” Dan’s voice seemed to break through when no one else there did. Others were watching, but he honestly didn’t care. He had to get to Chloe! Had to - “You’re barely communicating. Just sit down and relax. You see Chloe now, don’t you? She’s headed right here. There’s no reason to freak out if she’s not next to you every second of the day.”

“But -”

“I will shoot anyone who threatens her. You know this.”

For a brief second, he looked at Daniel, remembering where they were and who he was. If there was anyone else in the world who would protect her as fiercely as he would, it was Detective Douche. He already tried to kill a man for harming his ex-wife, and that was when they were estranged. Daniel would never let anyone hurt her. Even if she was carrying another man’s spawn. His spawn.

He was so thankful in that moment Daniel didn’t believe he was the Devil.

Still following Chloe’s every moment, Lucifer nodded and stopped struggling. He sat in the chair and even took back the oxygen the medic gave him, helping him breathe. It truly was hard to think when you couldn’t breathe. Soon enough Chloe was back at her desk, trying to smile at him. Concern for her worries started overriding his fears of losing her, bringing him back to present time a little more. What happened?

“Hey,” Daniel’s voice broke through, getting Chloe’s attention as he put a friendly hand on her shoulder, “is everything alright?”

She took a deep breath and slowly released it, controlling whatever tears she felt like shedding. Lucifer started extending a hand to hers to comfort her when he spotted it’s reddening state and pulled back. How much had he changed while he was out of it? Hiding his shame, he listened to her voice instead. “I’ll explain everything I can tonight. Still coming for tacos?”

“Can I come?”

Ella’s voice jerked Lucifer’s gaze away from her for a moment, having completely forgotten about her being the trigger of his... attack. Shameful all the way around, but now wasn’t the time to dwell on that. She looked apologetic but still wanted to be part of whatever was going on. “I’ll bring my mama’s salsa.”

Chloe gave her a small smile. “Yeah. I think that’d be best. Dan?”

Her ex nodded. “Couldn’t keep me away.”

“Great. Hey,” she looked down to the medic still attempting to get Lucifer to be more lucid, “is it okay if I talk to him alone for a bit?”

The man eyed Lucifer for a second before reaching to hold his wrist. Lucifer backed away, eyeing him as a madman. Why would he want to touch his devil hands? A small smirk came to his face. “Keep him seated as long as possible and keep the oxygen handy. Don’t let him get up too quickly either or he may pass out. I’ll be on standby just in case.”

“Coffee?” Ella offered, trying to make light of things. She glanced guiltily at Lucifer but he paid it little mind. Dan and the medic nodded, moving from their respected places around them. “Coffee. You two want anything? I can get you whatever you need! So -”

“We’ll stick with what he have,” Chloe cut her off, wiggling a half-eaten candy cane in the air. Why didn’t he notice it in her hand before? “Thanks though.”

“Not a problem.” Ella looked back to Lucifer sadly, giving his shoulder a small squeeze. “Sorry. Please feel better soon.”

Slowly the Devil nodded, a bit dazed by everything. Slowly the audience disbursed and the two were left alone again. His breathing slowed, he removed the mask and spoke quietly. “What happened?”

The detective swallowed before answering. “Well, Ella put everything together, loudly, hugged you, and you became stiff as a board. Completely unresponsive. Phil made sure you didn’t pass out and then the lieutenant asked to talk to me. So he did.”

“And?” What didn’t she want to tell him? What could possibly be harder to tell him than she was bearing his spawn?

She let out a long sigh and sad in his usual chair. They really should change seats. It wasn’t a good chair for someone in her condition. Good back support was necessary for her comfort and he would not have her tortured on top of - “This is going to be our last field assignment.”

The statement punched him in the gut. “What?”

Chloe took his red hand in hers, not minding its condition, and gave him a squeeze. “Lt. Taylor reprimanded me for not telling him about the pregnancy sooner. As this is a touchy case and we’re the ones assigned to it, he’s willing for us to finish it as normal, but it will be the last one until I have a doctor’s appointment declaring a due date and whether or not I’m cleared for office duty.”

“Office duty?” That can’t mean -

“It’s against procedure for a pregnant officer to be in the field. I’m allowed to keep working for as long as my health allows, but I won’t be allowed onto an active crime scene or in-person interrogation until after the baby comes and I’m cleared for duty. So not for a year, roughly.” She looked up from his hands to his eyes, a resignation set in her face. “This will be our last case together in the field.”

“For… for a year. Right?” A tremble went through his body at the thought. Chloe benched. Her career, her life, put on hold. All because of his actions. “In… in a year, we’ll be back out there. Catching criminals. Punishing murderers. Back to normal! Right?”

She shook her head, hanging down again. “It’s not that simple.”

Dread filled him. “How is it not that simple?”

She took another deep breath, trying to calm herself again before answering. “The lieutenant has an extra policy, one… I can’t argue against. One you won’t be able to argue too much against either. From what he told me…” She sighed, shaking her head slightly. “It really is the best option.”

“What is?” What was she holding back? “What is this ‘best option’?”

Chloe hesitated before answering. “After the baby is born, he doesn’t want you consulting in the field either.”

Malcolm must have shot him again. He could almost feel himself bleeding out. “What?”

“He doesn’t want partners in the field to be romantically involved,” she explained. “It distracts from the case and the danger risks are too high. Those officers with children together are separated by risks and whoever has seniority can choose fieldwork or desk work. If all hands are on deck for a case, he will send home one of the parents, regardless of how badly he needs officers.

“He’s even stricter about it with consultants.” Chloe looked up to him, pained beyond his metaphorical bullet wound. “After the baby’s here, he wants you to stay out of harm’s way and consult periodically and in a traditional capacity instead of as my partner.”

Was Dad dragging him back into Hell? Lucifer shook, his head jutting from side to side as he tried to deny this reality. “No… no no! He… he can’t do this to -”

“Lucifer, it might be for the best if -”

“It’s not!” Instantly he was on his feet, shedding the blanket and her hands. He knew she didn’t want to do this. He certainly didn’t want to! Not being allowed at his detective’s side every hour of the day was… was… Lucifer took a deep, powerful breath before snapping his attention to Lt. Bear in his office. He really did not like that office. Last time he spent more than a few minutes in there, he was nearly arrested under false charges from Cain! Cain! This Bear was not going to separate them!

“Be right back.”

“Lucif-”

He didn’t listen to her, trusting Daniel’s presence and her own skills in her small safe haven to be enough protection for the ten minutes he needed to convince the lieutenant this was a bad idea. He marched straight into the man’s office and put on his best deal-making face. “Lieutenant! Might I have a word with you?”

Not looking up from some paperwork, the man aptly described as a bear pointed his pen at the door. “Close that, Mr. Morningstar. You will not want anyone hearing what we have to say.”

Internally he grimaced at the man’s nonchalance and (reluctantly) obediently closed the doors. “I assume you know what we need to talk about?”

“I have no doubt whatsoever.” Lt. Taylor continued filling out the strange form Lucifer never saw before, occasionally looking something up on the computer. “You want to discuss the limitations I put on you and Detective Decker.”

“Precisely. Don’t you think they’re rather… restrictive?”

“Majority of them are standard procedures for expectant mothers in the police force. Putting her field career on pause for a year is not unheard of nor a sentence.” He glanced up to Lucifer, perfectly calm and without guilt. “This isn’t a punishment, it’s a precaution. She had to do this before when she had her first child. I currently have three other officers undergoing the same restrictions. Decker is no exception.”

Well, maybe he could agree to this part, but not the other. “Agreeable, but certainly, there is no need to separate us, now is there?”

The man’s hand paused while writing, a soft, almost not there, sigh escaping him. “It is also against policy for romantic partners to be partners in the field, Mr. Morningstar. It’s in the handbook. Honestly, I should have separated the two of you when I first started here,” Lucifer tensed at the statement, “but I held back because of your close rate. Not only do you have the best closing rate in the department, only one case you two were connected to was thrown out of court. The right guys were punished each time. I could not deny your effectiveness as a team.”

The Devil’s smile grew in pride. They were a great team. That is what kept them together through thick and thin. It was the start of their dance and it had to continue. If not… if not…

She may leave him.

If he were not her partner on her cases, what would bind them together? They had to stay together. No matter what.

“But,” the lieutenant started, looking up to him completely, “a baby changes everything. You’ll see that soon enough.”

Lucifer swallowed, shaking slightly as he forced a smile to his face. “It doesn’t change that much. We’d still be an effective team, spawn or no spawn.”

“I’m not talking about your work, Mr. Morningstar. I’m talking about your life. Everything from the 2 am feedings to teething fevers to mountains of laundry to those first steps and words. You’ll have to split your life in a million ways and make it work.” The way he looked straight at Lucifer almost unnerved him. “In consideration of the child, I cannot allow the two of you together in the field once it is born. Either you step down or Detective Decker does. And _she’s_ the police officer. The choice is obvious. Once the child is born, you are no longer allowed in the field and must act as other consultants, as a resource out of harm’s way.”

That was not happening. Putting up his best smile, about to broker a deal, Lucifer approached the desk. “Surely we can come to an arrangement.”

“That is the arrangement, Mr. Morningstar. That or we just fire you, which would be a shame overall.” The simplicity of his statement came with a smile. Why was he being so difficult?

“Tell me, Lieutenant, what is it that you desire, above everything else?”

He focused his power onto the man, ready to reach deep within him to get that dirty little secret and use it to get exactly what he wanted. If he had to sleep with the man to stay by Chloe’s side, he would. Blackmail? Not a problem. Money? Sure thing. A seat in the senate? Easy. Whatever he wanted, he’d get it.

What he wasn’t expecting was the quick, innocent response.

“I want to never have to tell someone their loved one isn’t coming home again.”

Stunned, Lucifer’s smile dropped and he blinked at the man before him. “What?”

Lt. Taylor looked to the side, fighting off tears as he eyed the many photographs on his walls. He looked at them too, noticing just how many of them there were. Individuals, families, people completely unrelated to him, littered the wall. Under each picture was a single name. The name of an officer.

“Every time someone under my command dies, I have reported it to their families and partners. I’ve attended more funerals than I care to count. The riot two years ago? We lost six officers. Six sets of parents without their child. Three wives without their husbands. One husband without his wife, and another without his husband. Eighteen children without a parent. And two dogs without owners.

“I’ve been to too many funerals and given too many condolences. And I know there will be more. It’s inevitable. But if I can avoid even one, I will.” He took a breath, calming himself before looking back at Lucifer. “My biggest fear is having to tell a child they’re an orphan. And for that reason alone, I will no allow you to go out into the field and in the line of fire after this case.

“You are going to be a father soon. And the second they put that child in your arms, everything will change.” Lucifer pulled his gaze away from the wall and to the man being more honest with him than anyone had been his entire existence. “If you want to keep Chloe in your life, _you_ _will_ hold that baby. You will be by her side for everything, the good and the bad. And when you’re holding it… your heart will break, melt back together, and be filled with so much… you won’t want to leave it for even a second. Children… they fill a place inside you you never knew was empty.

“I’ve watched you, Lucifer Morningstar. I’ve watched how you are with Chloe Decker, her daughter, her ex-husband Daniel Espinoza, Ella Lopez, and numerous others around the station. You wear your heart on your sleeve and though you pretend you don’t, you care for everyone very deeply. Your relationships are mostly friendly and light, but your dearest friends are here, and I’m willing to bet you somewhat depend on this job to keep these friendships. It's becoming a crutch for you, and I want to prove to you these relationships you’ve made are real and will last.

“When the baby comes, you won’t want to leave it, and you will be torn between your job, your friends, and your child. I’m making the decision easier for you when that day comes.” Lucifer swallowed, a part of him objecting to the man taking the decision away from him, but the rest of him couldn’t deny it. “You will stay on as a consultant, assisting when called upon and even allowed to help Detective Decker with ideas and talk about open cases. You just won’t be allowed out in the field where you could be shot or stabbed or burned or in the line of fire again. It’s a risk reduction, for everyone’s sakes.”

“But…” Lucifer tried to grab at straws, anything and everything he could to win, even though the fight wasn’t really in him anymore. “My skills and resources are best used in the field. You cannot deny -”

“You’re allowed in interrogations when called upon,” the lieutenant agreed, “but no further. I don’t know how you do it, but you get the confession. You are a very valuable resource, Mr. Morningstar. I don’t want to lose you, but I don’t want to tell your child you aren’t going to be there for their graduation.”

They stayed silent for a moment before he could come up with another objection. “Yet you’d let the Detective stay in the field.”

“After she’s cleared, after birth. It’s her job.” He eyed him knowingly. “And if you’re going to deny her her job, you’ll be sleeping on the couch for a long time.”

Lucifer looked away, unsure of what to do. It’d been a long time since he truly lost a deal, and never quite like this. He couldn’t get what he wanted and not because he was just denied it by another individual. He had a lot to think about.

“Now if you don’t mind,” Lt. Taylor picked his pen back up and pointed to his form, “I have to report Detective Decker’s condition and arrange for cold cases to take up the next six to seven months of her life. I won’t make you leave her side until the baby’s here, so I’m looking forward to a lot of closed cold cases in the next few months. Also have to manage her maternity leave and medical assessments… You two need to see a doctor soon and get a rough due date. Getting someone to cover her other cases and monthly assessments means a lot of paperwork. If there’s nothing else you wish to discuss…”

He hesitated. Looking away and around like an awkward teenager, he took a breath and admitted something important. “There is… one thing. Because I declare myself the Devil, other people may -”

“Believe you and think Decker’s baby will be the Anti-Christ?”

He blinked. How did Lt. Bear know this and be so casual about it? Lucifer nodded, fear bubbling inside him.

The man nodded. “She mentioned it and it explains your behavior quite a bit. Can’t control crazy but when we know it’s coming we can prepare for it. I’m also taking precautions to prevent her murder by extremists. The only ones who will know her schedule and location will be those the two of you trust and those who absolutely must know. It’s also why I’m not chasing you out of the building so soon, Mr. Morningstar. I hated being away from my wife’s side when she was pregnant too.

“I’ll also arrange a protection detail when the baby comes while in the hospital. If it comes early while she’s here, she’ll have a police escort.” He gave Lucifer a soft smile. “Don’t worry about a thing. We will take care of the two of them, no matter what. I watch over my own very carefully. But only if I can get the paperwork done. Understood?”

Lucifer looked to the forms on the desk. All this because he couldn’t prevent conception. He nodded submissively, truly unable to object. Lt. Bear smiled with a nod. “Good. And while you’re at the hospital, talk to someone about your eczema. Your hands look terrible.”

He looked down to his devil hands and quickly hid them in his coat pockets before leaving. Chloe stood a few feet away from the office doors, having watched the entire debate. She watched him cautiously, approaching him with worry. Had he scared her? Is this how she felt when she left the office earlier? How she felt when she saw his face? Everything felt unsteady.

“Lucifer? Are you alright?”

Concern and love for him swam in her heavenly eyes. He couldn’t stop the soft, sad smile on his face seeing her. Sad… because their long endearing partnership may soon come to an end. And it was truly his fault.

And yet there was still some hope in the form of a spawn. The very spawn that would soon separate them.

Slowly, his head down, Lucifer made his way back to her desk and took his usual chair. He took back the oxygen mask and breathed deeply, hoping it’d help with the way the world seemed to shift around him. Chloe sat back down in her chair, focused solely on him and silently begging for a response. After a few silent breaths, he put it down between his knees and answered.

“I have a lot to think about.”

Somehow, his detective seemed to understand, smiling kindly. She ran a hand through his hair and down his neck comfortingly. “I know.”

“Everything’s going to change.”

“Yep.”

“Everything.”

Chloe held his free hand and ran her other down the opposite arm. It was a lot to take in. She’d been through it before, she knew what he was going through. Little changed for an immortal, but when it did, it hit him harder than any could desire. “Now you know what it feels like.”

He couldn’t stop the weak laugh out his lips, but it didn’t help the weight inside him. His world was going to change, and he wasn’t so sure he wanted it to. He felt more than saw Chloe lift his chin, forcing him to look at her. Her soft smile tried to soothe his soul. “It’s alright. We’ll go through it all together, okay? And we have several months to prepare for it. You won’t be alone, so long as you don’t leave me either.”

He squeezed her hand, making his promise. “Never again. If you’ll have me.”

Her smile grew. “I think the baby sealed the deal on that one, Lucifer.”

Sealed the deal.

In the back of his mind, he prayed it really had.


	5. Hello, Good Doctor, I’m the Devil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe and Lucifer go to the doctors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't shoot me for any inaccuracies, this is based on observations at work and largely off my cowardness to not just ask the nurses.  
> Also, on a note for RL, we've been having trouble keeping hand sanitizer stocked in hospitals due to people panicking. I understand the media made you scared, but please please please! Cool off and don't take sanitizers out of hospitals! Ours is on backorder for 2 months! In a place where cross-contamination is most likely! Instead, invest in dish soap. You'll be sanitary, free of grease, and your hands will come out smelling nice and soft when you wash. I trust it more whenever my hands are dirty than anything else. Panicking puts more people at risk than treating it like the generic flu.  
> Rant over, enjoy the chapter!

Lucifer couldn’t stop the habit he developed before Johnny’s spell made his job easier. He constantly looked around for any sign of a threat, always coming up empty. Chloe was invisible to anyone who intended her harm, he had to remind himself. Most people didn’t know who either of them were and therefore didn’t care what was going on in their lives or if they were expecting a spawn. Linda had to remind him of this in their last session – his second major panic attack concerned him greatly – and made him repeat it several times. She reminded him almost constantly those who even knew she was pregnant were friends or colleagues vetted by a superior who was also on their side. Who knew Lt. Bear was more a Papa bear than a grizzly? He had to calm down and accept the fact Chloe was pregnant and they would have a child some time in the next 7-8 months.

They had to know the exact date of the child’s arrival. That was why they were there.

But by going to the doctor’s, they were also confirming to the world the child existed.

Lucifer was glad the building was cold and he had an excuse to wear gloves and a scarf. Scared and stressed were just the tip of his anxieties today.

A greying volunteer brought them to a very secure part of the hospital, both impressing and terrifying the Devil. He hated locked doors and the trapped feeling he’d get seeing them, but right then he knew they were necessary for keeping the bad men out. Bad men needed to stay out of this ward more than anywhere else.

Pushing through the electronically locked door, the volunteer cheerily directed them down a long hallway with cameras pointed at the doors, briefly showing them the postpartum area before directing them to labor. Did they really keep them separated? What was the difference anyway? Questions plagued his mind as they made their way to a smaller, even more secure part of the ward. So much security for mothers and their spawn. He was starting to feel claustrophobic.

One of the nurses at the station looked up from her computer and smiled brightly while still looking exhausted. Did he just hear someone scream? Lucifer jerked his eyes to the source: a closed-door just six feet away. Flashes of Hell nearly drowned out Chloe talking to the nurse. “I have an appointment with Dr. Bensen?”

“Chloe Decker, right?” The nurse picked up a note as she nodded. “Alright, Dr. Bensen will be over in about... half an hour? He had a delivery at St. Mary’s. If you’d like, we can have Dr. Enos check on you. It’s a determination appointment, right?”

“Yeah. It is.”

“What kind of doctor isn’t here for his own appointment? Bad form!” Chloe slapped Lucifer’s arm lightly, glaring at him. He rubbed the spot, pouting. “Well, it is.”

“He’s busy with a lot of patients. He comes highly recommended.” Her eyes narrowed on him, threatening to shoot him if he didn’t lighten up. Good thing her gun was in the car. “And deliveries come first. This was just going to be a meetup.”

“What was wrong with your last doctor anyway? She sounded perfectly fine to me.”

Her eyes narrowed on him again. “She’s in Canada. Retired.”

“Who in their right mind would go to Canada to retire?” And how soon could he leave this proverbial Hell? That woman just kept screaming in pain! And there was another one just down the hall! And the flashing red light on the screens near the nurses! And the dinging! And… was that a cat screaming now?

The nurse eyed him warily as Chloe took in a breath for patience. “Is your husband feeling alright? He looks… flushed... and pale.”

“We’re not married,” Chloe casually dropped and still answered, “and this is normal. He’s got stressed induced eczema and he’s not fond of closed areas and screaming behind doors.”

Lucifer jerked his eyes away from everything else and stared at her. “When did you learn that?”

“The Gretel case. We’re with homicide,” she explained to the nurse just to clear up any confusion. Poor lady was really concerned for Lucifer, which was a nice switch actually compared to all the women who would normally hit on him. Somehow his seductive charm had toned down since his last long stay in Hell. “Dr. Enos would be fine.”

“Right this way then.” The nurse got up from her seat and asked one of the others sitting there to inform the doctor once he was done in another room. She picked up a pile of paperwork – did every occupation have a mountain of it when a spawn was created? – and directed them to a room they already passed. Before they made it inside, he could swear he heard a second cat screeching seconds after the loudest and most painful scream he heard in his existence. What were they doing to these poor women?

“That’s the sound of a baby being born.”

Lucifer jerked his head around to the nurse who smirked at him. “First time in a maternity ward?”

His smile trembled. “That obvious?”

“Quite.” She directed Chloe to the small narrow bed in the middle of a small room, making the Devil frown. Why was it so small? Hardly seemed right for something of this magnitude. But the Detective didn’t seem to care and put her purse on a chair as the nurse gave her a few instructions. Mostly to take it easy and try to pee in a cup before ultrasound came down and the doctor could see them. The nurse even took the gown off the end of the bed, assuring them they didn’t need it for this visit. “Lab will be down here in a few minutes to draw some blood. Do you need anything? Water? A snack? Coffee? Tea?”

“Vodka would be nice.”

Chloe gave him a chiding glare before taking the pee cup and thinking about it. “Water would be great. I don’t really feel like peeing. And he’ll have cool ranch puffs if you have any.”

The nurse nodded, smiling with some humor at their interactions. “I think they just restocked that. Take your time and I’ll be right back with them. Please fill out those forms while you wait.”

With that the nurse left them in peace, closing the door almost completely. It was closed enough that they couldn’t hear any more screaming or meowing but open enough to be allowed to escape. And they could hear an old lullaby playing for some reason. Lucifer scowled in confusion at the door before starting to circle the room. He opened the blinds of the one window facing outward and grimaced at the view: mostly the building’s roof and the parking lot beyond it. “The best view money can buy, I bet.”

“It’s a triage room in the most secure part of the building, Lucifer. The view’s not supposed to be great.” Chloe sat on the bed and started working on the forms with practiced ease. He really would never understand why they had paperwork for every stupid thing. “We can look at postpartum rooms later and pick the one we want when the baby comes. They’re usually bigger and have better views.”

“Or I can hire a midwife and handle everything at the apartment.” It was a simple idea and one he was rather fond of. Security was assured, the circle kept small, and if he had to make people disappear, there would be less to worry about.

He could almost see her rolling her eyes at him. “And if there’s complications? If it turns the wrong way? If I start bleeding out? Lucifer, I’m nearly forty. Trixie’s twelve. These are not ideal circumstances for having a baby. I might need a c-section when it won’t come out normally, and midwives can’t perform those. Overall, it’s better to have it in a hospital. Just in case.”

Dread returned to Lucifer as she related to him all the problems with childbirth at her age and experience. He truly needed to read up on everything related to the subject of pregnancy and giving birth. Sex he was an expert on. Everything after was a mystery he dreaded to learn. Were there really that many risks? And what did age or having a teenaged spawn have to do with it? Mortals were so confusing.

“Of course. You are the one most knowledgeable on this subject. I’ll follow your lead.” He looked out the window, still anxious. “I just… I’m not fond of… this place… maybe.”

Chloe’s eyes were on him, he could feel it, but it didn’t stop his stomach twisting in nerves. With this visit, they had declared her maybe pregnant and by the end confirmed it. He trusted her gut already confirming it, but he really wished she was wrong at the same time. With this, there would be no doubt in any minds and everything would change drastically. And yet, hearing the screams and being so closed off, he felt more trapped in the past than he thought possible.

Why couldn’t he just be a man and she a woman expecting their child?

He felt her arms slip around him and his nerves undid themselves a little. “Hey. It’s going to be okay. I’m scared too. If this place is too much for you, we can check out other hospitals and clinics. Find the right one for us. We don’t even have to have Dr. Bensen there or the other doctor they recommended. We’re just here to confirm there’s a baby and how far along it is. We’re not committed to this place, just checking it out.

“So don’t worry, you devilish angel. We’re in this together. We’ll figure it out.”

“I hope so.” Taking her hands in his, Lucifer turned around and faced her, a little more relaxed and a small smile on his face. They were in this together. That was all he needed.

Their nurse knocked, announcing her return with a small pitcher of water, cup, and bag of his favorite treat, a smile on her lips. “Okay, got your drink and treat. Just press the call button after you’ve taken your sample and I’ll take it off your hands. Same with the paperwork.”

“Thank you,” Chloe confirmed, smiling at the lady and letting her go back to whatever nurse thing she was working on before. Her leaving them alone for a second time made Lucifer almost scowl in thought. “What’s up now?”

“This is going to be boring, isn’t it?”

She couldn’t help the small laugh as she nodded. “Yeah. Pretty boring.”

“Bloody hell...” He let go of her hands and opened his cool ranch puffs, resigning himself to boredom with small sprints of interesting.

* * *

A different nurse took her blood sample before Chloe finally had the urge to pee. Samples and paperwork were collected minutes before another specialist came in the room with a large machine taking up a small part of the room, setting itself up next to her. Apparently not every triage room had an ultrasound in it and theirs had to be rolled in. Much to Lucifer’s disappointment, the tech closed the blinds before asking Chloe to lift her shirt in the same way those magic users did two days ago. A gel Mazikeen told him about was placed on her belly and he found himself holding the bed’s bar and Chloe’s hand as he watched her place another device on the gel. Would that thing really not harm her or the spawn? And could see it? The things humans managed to make…

A soft knock brought their attention away from the technician and the screen, announcing someone new. “Sorry for the delay,” came a friendly male voice before coming into view. A small Hawaiian man in his 50’s carefully made his way towards them, mindful of the procedure and the lighting. “I was told you wanted to meet Dr. Bensen, but his delivery turned into a c-section and he’s still on the road coming back. I’m Dr. Enos. And you must be Chloe Decker.”

He offered her his hand, his smile reaching his eyes and a light in them similar to Ella’s caught their attention. Lucifer could feel the nerves inside him unwinding. Anyone who reminded him of Ella Lopez was well worth their weight in gold. Chloe took his hand, smiling. “Right in one.”

His smile broadened as he released his grip and turned to Lucifer. “And you’re her… partner?”

At least he didn’t jump to the conclusion of husband or boyfriend. They certainly were in a relationship, but it was hard to say if they were just lovers or more some days. Partner was the best description for them. He smiled at the doctor and released his grip on other things long enough to take his hand. “Lucifer Morningstar.”

The man’s eyebrows raised in interest. “Really?”

“Yes.”

“Huh. You poor soul.” The man’s smile didn’t fade and only made theirs grow. “You must have been teased a lot in school.”

Lucifer shrugged, tension leaving him more and more by the second. “You would think that.”

They let go of each other as the doctor opened the file in his hands. “Well, you’d be happy to know how fast and easy it is to confirm pregnancy these days. You are indeed pregnant, Ms. Decker. And from our calculations, you’re about nine weeks along.”

“Nine weeks?” The pair exchanged surprised looks. They only suspected pregnancy a month ago!

Dr. Enos nodded then looked at the screen. “Nine to ten actually. Almost a fourth of the way through. Still too early to determine sex but late enough to start showing. But it looks like you carry them deep.”

“I’ll say,” started the tech, shaking her head. “Having trouble finding the little guys. Ah! There it is! We have baby on board.”

Lucifer leaned over, trying to get a good look at the screen and figure out what he was looking for. Was it that bean of a thing to one side or that blobby thing on the other end? So hard to tell. “That’s it?”

“Yep. That’s it.” The doctor’s smile softened, even more, looking at it. “We can find out the sex of the baby in about three more months, once the riskiest part is over.”

“Riskiest?” Lucifer snapped his attention back to the man, worry starting to eat at him again.

Dr. Enos nodded, giving him his full attention. “The majority of miscarriages happen within the first trimester. But so long as you avoid stress, rest and eat properly, and don’t overexert yourself, there shouldn’t be any problems.”

“What about age risks?” Chloe piped up, squeezing Lucifer’s hand. “I’m not exactly in the prime of my life.”

“Well, yes, there are risks due to age,” the doctor admitted, “but you already had a child, so the risks are lower than you think.”

“That was twelve years ago.”

The man nodded again. “It would have been safer if the gap was smaller, but not by much. The most trouble you’re likely to have is in delivery, since you’re out of practice, but I know a nurse who had a fifteen-year age gap between children and she was up and walking about within an hour after delivery. She went home the next day, no complications.

“Just rest, eat well, avoid overexertion and stress, and stop worrying about it. Really, worrying too much is the worst thing you can do for yourself and your baby. Have regular checkups every few weeks to check your progress and we can avoid any major problems we come across. Alright?”

He gave them an encouraging smile and some tension left them again. It was hard to worry or feel scared when this man smiled at you. They both nodded, properly encouraged. “Alright.”

“Good.”

“Would you like your baby’s first picture?” The tech’s innocent question brought more confusion to Lucifer’s face. How could something the size of a bean have a picture? But Chloe brightened up instantly.

“Yes! I’d love it!”

“Alright, just give me a minute to print it out for you.” The young lady removed her sticky stick away from Chloe and took out a wipe to help her clean up the gel. The doctor nodded in approval before looking at the paperwork again.

“Seeing as there’s no signs of malnutrition, blood sugar imbalance, or a history of health issues to speak of, I see no reason to keep you here longer than necessary. I’ll finish compiling your records for your usual doctor and pass him the details for your meeting with him so you can be discharged.”

“Uhm… could you hold off on that for a second?” Chloe propped herself back up, pulling her shirt down and confusing Lucifer a bit more. Hold off getting out of there? What for? Dr. Enos seemed confused as well. “You see, we’ve never met Dr. Bensen, and we’re not sure about where we’ll have the baby yet either.”

The doctor nodded. “It is rather early to decide that. But I assure you, Brent is a fine doctor. There’s really nothing to worry about.”

“That may be the case,” she admitted, “but there’s more to it than that.” She inclined her head to Lucifer, who watched them both in confusion. “Some people actually believe he’s the Devil.”

“But I am -”

Chloe smacked his arm to keep him quiet. “And are likely to believe our kid is the Anti-Christ. So… we’re a little worried about those who would take care of us.”

Dr. Enos watched them for a second before nodding, letting out a long sigh. “I see. People really don’t understand their scripture.”

Lucifer blinked at him. “Come again?”

“In my church, we believe the devil doesn’t have a body, so the entire idea of a literal child of Satan is ludicrous.” He smirked sadly. “The Anti-Christ are just his followers and deniers of Christ. Easily misguided men with too much pride.”

The Devil grinned, glad someone got that part right. “I like this church! About time some of Dad’s fans got something right. Well, the denier’s part. Not terribly fond of followers myself. They tend to go off the wall.”

Dr. Enos raised an eyebrow at him before looking back to Chloe. She grimaced. “He’s seeing a therapist. And mostly harmless.”

“I see…” The man was clearly thinking things over.

“Would it be alright if you became our doctor?”

“Yes, please,” Lucifer added, genuinely liking the man. “If money’s the issue, I can pay any price.”

The man stood in silence a moment, thinking about something. All they could hear was the ultrasound’s printer working and their own heartbeats. Just after the printer finished, Dr. Enos came back to the bed, taking a card out of his pocket. “We can discuss this more at my office in a few days. I’m actually a family doctor, specializing in pediatrics and help with prenatal care, but I take care of a little of everything. And before I say yes,” he pointed at Lucifer, “I need to speak with your therapist. Judging by your actions and request, there’s some anxiety on your part?”

“He’s had two massive panic attacks over this,” Chloe interjected, getting the man in question to weakly grin. “And nearly freaked out hearing someone pushing when we were in the hallway.”

“Is that what that was?” He looked awkwardly between everyone in the room. “I could have sworn someone was being tortured.”

“Rough childhood and early adult years.”

“I can tell.” Giving him his card, Dr. Enos smiled kindly at them. “If you’d give me the number of your therapist, I’ll gladly look into it. It’s no good if Daddy faints while Mommy’s pushing a baby out.”

Lucifer gaped at them, offended. “I do not faint!”

“Nearly did.” That got her a scowl and her maybe-new doctor to chuckle. Chloe batted her eyes at Lucifer with a smile. “Mind grabbing my purse? He needs Linda’s number.”

Shaking his head, the Devil did as he was asked about the same time there was another knock. “Sorry for the delay! Is Chloe Decker in here?”

Lucifer stopped briefly, seeing the man about Chloe’s age looking straight through her. Trouble. _This_ he could handle. Almost instantly he put on his charming grin, striding over. “Doctor Brent Bensen, I presume! May I have a word with you first?”

He made no notion of Chloe being there and she picked up on his actions almost immediately. He’d handle the man who could only see him and she’d handle the good people who actually tried to help them. The Devil was on the not so good doctor within seconds, offering his hand. “Lucifer Morningstar, at your service. Let’s have a small chat in the hall, shall we?”

The man visibly paled, his voice caught in his throat. “I… I…”

“Splendid! Won’t be more than a tick, darling.” He angled his head just right so those behind him knew he was talking to them and the man before him would think he was calling to someone in the bathroom. He had to get rid of this man, fast. Within seconds, he was in the dreaded hallway, almost pulling the man into a more vacant part of the super-secure building where no cameras would catch them. The lug didn’t even know how to fight back, likely a new recruit to the entire affair. So no, he would not be pulling out his arms any time soon.

But the doctor didn’t have to know that. With a sickeningly sweet smile, Lucifer pinned him to a wall out of everyone’s view. “So, doctor! Do tell me, did they offer you money or are you a true believer?”

The guy just crossed himself, almost jabbering. True believer it was, and a terrified one at that. He had his work cut out for him. So he sighed. “I see. Well, I’m sorry to say crossing yourself doesn’t save you from anything, least of all me. Killing a mother and her unborn spawn though ensures you would be in my domain. Dad doesn’t take kindly to murdering infants, but he hadn’t told us much about the unborn in general so I know little about how that affects your soul. But do know, baby killers receive a special torture in Hell. Lilith is quite fond of them and I’m not about to spoil her fun.

“So before you attempt to do anything, like insisting to be the doctor of my partner or informing your new friends about today, know that they are not just targeting my spawn, but my father’s grand-spawn as well. Heaven will be lost to you if you go down this path, and Hell will not be kind.”

Watching the man shake, his eyes blown wide, Lucifer felt he got the message through. He smiled sweetly and patted his cheek. “So how about a deal? For your soul to stay far away from Hell, stay far away from Detective Decker and those who wish to harm her and our spawn. You can stay in your profession, stay in his hospital even – I don’t believe we’ll be returning – and do as you have before. Be the good doctor you’ve been for years, stay highly recommended. Just don’t have anything to do with us or those with blood on their hands already. Deal?”

“A… a deal with the Devil is -”

“Believe me, you benefit much more than I do. I’m just telling you to ignore us and live your life as you have before hearing of our existence. You will not be our doctor. That’s all there should be to this.” He smiled nicely, this time not trying to scare him. This one could be reasoned with, it seemed. Possibly.

“The Anti-”

“Is closer related to your friends than me.” Lucifer had a feeling he’d be having this debate over and over again until either the urchin was dead or fully grown, and at that point, he wasn’t sure what he wanted. All he knew was he needed to keep Chloe safe. “It’s hardly a deal. More of an impasse. We both walk away. Okay?”

The man still shook, terrified of the Devil. At least he wasn’t a threat at the moment. He let go of the man, rolling his eyes and backing away. “If you feel so bad about all of this, just ask my Dad. Go… pray or something. Maybe he’ll answer you, I don’t know. The choice is yours, but do know I will hurt anyone who tries to harm my partner, and if you try to take that child from her, hurting her or worse, I will send you to Hell early. Got it?”

The doctor weakly nodded, getting the message through his terrified mind. Lucifer grinned. “Lovely.

“Well, best we off then! See you again never, I hope.” With that, Lucifer twirled away from him and went back to the triage room where Chloe was finalizing something with Dr. Enos. “I see everything’s worked out?”

The older doctor eyed him curiously. “So far. Where’s Dr. Bensen?”

“Likely gathering his wits after meeting the Devil.” He hoped this didn’t turn the kind man off from helping them. He really liked his open-mindedness. Chloe gave him a look and he threw up his hands in his defense. “He’s fine. We just talked. He’s a new believer and it’ll take him a while to get his wits about him again. Hopefully, he’ll be just as good a doctor as you’ve ever known him.”

“What did you tell him?” There was a small bite in his love’s words, demanding an answer that would satisfy everyone there. So he smiled back.

“I told him to walk away. We may have found someone better, after all.” He gave a small apologetic smile to Dr. Enos who still seemed to be on the fence about something. He reeeaally hoped he didn’t scare the man away. Only Dad would know if he had.

This answer satisfied his detective and she nodded. Well, at least the visit was a success and they may have found the right doctor for this adventure.

Now the hard part would begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes... the hard part because I'm gonna be a lot more disjointed after this. I only have a few small scenes planned out between here and delivery so you won't be waiting as long, I hope. Suggestions might actually help with this one.  
> Dr. Enos will be sticking around. I like him.


	6. The Devil and His Demon Walk into a Nursery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe sets up the nursery, Lucifer sets up the crib, and Maze makes popcorn and looks scary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIIIIIIVVVVEEE!!!!  
> Yeah, been a bit but, you know, RL. And I still work and have other ideas and fangirl and... Honestly, this chapter was so hard to write for some reason! And I still don't like it! I hate doing settings! So yeah, this one runs on and on, but the last bit is what I wanted most of all.  
> There's another OC in here, but they aren't coming back for a very long time, if at all in this fic (this is turning into a huge AU for me. curse you Brain!). Part of this was suggested by others in the comments, so please keep making suggestions. Just know I've never put a crib together before so I glossed over it.  
> ENjoy!

* * *

Needless to say, Chloe Decker and her daughter moved in with the Devil. This happened months ago, long before the baby was conceived, but it was about time someone clarified things. Most of Lucifer’s guests only saw the area before the elevator doors and maybe the main bathroom and walk-in closet. They did not know about the four other bedrooms, the two other bathrooms, their respective closets, or the large kitchen and dining room attached to it. The penthouse was more than a general living area, open bedroom and a balcony after all.

Shortly after some gruff men invaded his home to try to kill him and the detective’s spawn several years back, Lucifer added a card-key feature to the elevator, blocking anyone from trying to use it against him again and limiting access to the upper floors. He also added it to the hidden staircase (“It clashed with the decor, Detective!”) linking lower floors to the secondary bathroom, just in case someone realized fire regulations were still followed by the Devil. If anyone tried to force the doors without proper access, Maze added a secondary measure to ensure the attacker could not come in without making a ruckus. It involved very sharp items Chloe was not letting Trixie near, but everyone knew the pre-teen touched anyway. They had to use the key-card to get into the apartment but could leave without it at any time.

Only a handful of people had access to it these days, stopping all surprise guests and invitations to sexy times, very much to Chloe’s pleasure. He also added a kind of door to their bedroom, still not fond of them. More of a curtain really, guaranteeing privacy but not security. Trixie’s room was the furthest from theirs for good reason.

But with a baby on the way, their living arrangements had to change.

One of the first things Lucifer did after getting over his first panic attack was arrange for Maze to live with them again. The demon didn’t argue because 1) she wanted to protect them too, 2) free rent, 3) he was paying her and asking instead of demanding, and4) plenty of chances to see a freaked out Devil – which was going to be hysterical on so many levels. Her room was closest to Trixie’s and right next to the staircase entrance. They jokingly dubbed it the arsenal, but it was pretty accurate as well.

The next thing he did was upgrade the security system to a thumb print and voice recognition software. There was still the key-card system, but he put the ‘cards’ in fashionable bracelets after forgetting his for the sixth time in the car. He may not need it to get in and out of his apartment, but using his wings because he forgot his key was pretty pathetic even to him. Some people thought he was being overly paranoid, but anyone who knew him and his life knew he was being cautious.

Overall, he made visiting his home very troublesome. Especially for contractors.

“Is all this security really necessary?” Debora, an interior designer, wondered out loud as she followed the bartender and LUX manager to the penthouse. Patrick was one of the few who was granted access from about 7am to 1am, and strictly for business purposes. Sexy times on this floor were done and gone and he was fine with it. Times change people and if the changes meant he was almost running the best club in LA, he’d roll with anything. Besides, it wasn’t so bad seeing his boss domesticated.

“If you asked me that ten years ago, I’d say so. But…” He shrugged, not wanting to go into too much detail. A lot had happened in the past ten years, and this was just a contractor who wouldn’t be there for very long. No need to freak her out. “Boss is expecting a baby. I’m pretty sure he’s allowed to be overprotective with his first one ever.”

“Ah… that makes a lot of sense.” Debora nodded, tension leaving her a little. She pushed up her glasses. “Though, living over a bar with a kid isn’t ideal. Wouldn’t it be better if he just moved to a nice neighborhood? We could make the house from scratch and -”

“He’s got about a dozen properties around LA,” Patrick informed her. He thought so too, but he also knew his boss. If he left his penthouse, it’d be because Chloe said it was for the best, and she wouldn’t push it when he was freaking out over her being pregnant. Everyone was following her lead on this one. “When _he_ decides there’s not enough room there for all of them, they’ll move to one of those. But right now, he just wants to talk to you about one room. Please just focus on that. Boss isn’t so great with thinking too far into the future.”

With Lucifer Morningstar, it was best to just take things slowly and expect a sudden twist last second. He pressed his thumb against a camouflaged panel next to the buttons when the elevator stopped at the top and the doors opened with a slight ‘ding’. Closest thing to a doorbell they had if the person already passed the other two security measures. The two mortals stepped into the apartment and were immediately greeted by one former bartender wielding knives.

Debora was starting to regret this house call.

Patrick stepped up, smiling at Maze’s greeting. “Hey Maze! Brought the contractor the boss called in.”

Maze eyed them both for a moment before letting down her knives. “Interior designer number three?”

Number three? Patrick just nodded. “Shall I make some introductions?”

“Maze, who’s there?” The contractor turned her head towards the unfamiliar female voice coming towards them and didn’t see the scary lady’s stance ease a little more.

“Jackpot designer,” Maze called back. Within minutes, Chloe same into view and Debora smiled at how normal she seemed. The weird one relaxed entirely. “Definitely jackpot. We’re good, Patrick. I think she’s going to stay.”

“Good to know.” Patrick looked over to Chloe as she came closer and the boss as he came into view, cautiously eyeing the woman. Not his problem, he just worked there. “Boss, there’s a shipment coming in today around three. Will you be here to verify details?”

Lucifer looked from him to the three women in the room, unsure. Maze made the decision for him. “I’ll pick up Trix.”

“Then I’ll be down at three.” Patrick nodded to his boss then excused himself from the weird atmosphere that became the penthouse whenever they brought someone new up to meet them. Things had changed, mostly for the better, but things also got weird when his beloved got preggers. Oh well, work for a man who thinks he’s the Devil, get weirdness thrown in every once in a while. Not his problem. He just worked there.

“Thank you for coming,” Chloe started with Debora, smiling and taking her hand easily. “I’m Chloe Decker. You’ve met Mazikeen -”

“Yo.” Maze gave her a half wave, a knife still in her hand.

“- and tall, dark and mysterious is Lucifer Morningstar.” Chloe looked over to the man still a fair distance away, eyeing the designer. She grinned and winked at her jokingly. “He’s paying for everything.”

“I bloody well hope so. What with your paychecks, we’d never keep the lights on.” He seemed to try and pass it as a joke, but the designer could tell he was still tense. Tense and incredibly handsome. It was hard not to look at him and focus on the woman.

“Debora Rensfield. You were the one I talked to over the phone? About a nursery?”

“Yep. That was me.” Chloe seemed to beam when she responded to her and started to guide her further into the apartment. The handsome Devil was still watching them but less protectively than before. “We have two rooms available and 28 weeks to get one of them ready for the baby.”

“Do you know the baby’s gender yet?” Looking around the main body of the place, she could tell this was just recently turned from a classy bachelor pad into a home for a growing family. It’d be near impossible to match the decor and make it child friendly.

The lady shook her head. “Too soon. We’ll be checking in a few weeks, but right now, we’re just getting used to the fact that a baby’s coming.”

She threw a pointed look at the man involved and he shifted uncomfortably where he stood. They closed the distance towards the rest of the living areas, followed by the weird bodyguard who seemed to be very amused. There was a lot Debora was missing, but it really didn’t matter. Not really. Seriously it didn’t.

Curse her curiosity.

“Well, we can go over multiple plans, in case you want it to be gender specific -”

“And if the spawn wishes to choose it’s own gender?” Lucifer cut in, getting a scowl from his lover. He shrugged, trying to cover for himself. “Just saying.”

“We can make it gender neutral,” Debora insisted. She really did not want to go into that debate. “But there are some studies saying certain colors and environments can alter a child’s personality and actions when they’re young. Pink, for instance, is said to make a child more aggressive. Blue calms them. Yellow makes them cheery. But there’s also shades that alter this and patterns and -”

“There’s a lot to consider,” Chloe agreed as they made it to the hallway, turning before the stairs to the curtained off area. “Like, that’s the master bedroom with the bathroom and walk in closet on the other side. We’re debating which room to use. I say the closer one but Lucifer wants it a little further in, next to Maze’s room. Which do you think is better?”

The interior designer mentally stopped at thinking the master bedroom had a curtain for a door before even considering looking at the other two rooms. This client seemed really eager to get the nursery done judging by the pace they were going at. So she stopped, took a step back, breathed, and forced them to slow down. “Okay, first off, could I just get to know you two? Or three? Figure things out? You’re going really fast for me.”

All three adults stopped for a moment, staring at her, before two looked sheepish and the third just grinned wolfishly. Creepy lady in back really needed to be less creepy. Chloe rubbed the back of her neck, apologetic. “Sorry. It’s just… we’ve had two others come by and they… left when they saw us. I just… I’ve never had any room professionally done before, and I just can’t see this guy -” She lightly slapped Lucifer’s arm “- painting walls and talking about which crib is best. He’s not a DIY guy. Unless it’s booze or sex.”

“You never complained about that before.” He sounded a little hurt but Debora wasn’t sure if he was serious. The look his lover gave him said ‘later’ and he gave up on it.

“I just… really want a professional’s help getting things ready for this little guy. I don’t want to have it sleeping in a sock drawer because I failed to -”

Hormones. Got it. She smiled kindly and put on her best game face before her client became a pile of tears. “Then we better get to work then. I would personally pick the room closer to yours for 2am feedings, but if your main concern is security, one closer to your bodyguard wouldn’t be a bad idea either. The choice is merely the difference between convenience and security. Now the first question with that is: who sleeps on which side of the bed?”

“What?” Confusion controlled the couple while their bodyguard laughed.

“Oh, this is gonna be good.”

* * *

“We’re not doing a hellscape, Maze!” Lucifer’s insistence was getting louder and louder every time demon pressed her preference. The poor interior designer was starting to need breaks from their arguing, and so was the expecting mother. “I see enough of it every Sunday! I don’t want to bring it home with me!”

“But it’d be perfect!” Maze whipped a knife-free hand around the room, still wishing things went her way. “The screaming! The crying! The smells! It’s perfect for Hell!”

“Please don’t remind me of the screaming…” Lucifer ran his hand over his face, taking deep breaths. Even visiting Charlie hadn’t helped him with his anxiety over this. The kid had _lungs_.

“See? It’s HELL!” And she had the gall to be happy about it.

“We can soundproof the room, right?” He looked back to the designer and Chloe, desperate to push the idea away from him. The spawn would come out screaming and would likely keep them up late at night. He would have liked to soundproof Maze’s room too with how loud she played her music some nights.

“We’re definitely soundproofing the room,” Chloe agreed, but for slightly different reasons. “We’re also getting baby monitors, since we picked the furthest room.”

Safety won over convenience, especially since Lucifer slept closest to the door. Debora also seemed to think of some other thing in regards to this, but only shared it with his detective, which made her laugh. He was certain it was at his expense. He cringed at the idea of a walkie-talkie on by their bed all night for any sounds of discomfort. How was he supposed to have sex with that buzzing in their ears? “Well, at least it won’t sound that much like a tortured soul.”

“No, it’s going to sound like a cat.” The lord of Hell glared at his bodyguard, who just grinned. “Come on! It’s gonna be the heir to Hell! You’ve got to start early to get it used to it!”

“If I have anything to say about it, only you and I are going near Hell.” Dad forbid Chloe or her spawns ever touched that place. Maybe they’d get lucky and this one would be mostly human. “The Detective’s offspring stay with her, Silver City bound.”

“How boring.”

“We’re not going to get anywhere with the two of them around, are we?” Debora and Chloe stood off to the side, not interested in continuing the argument.

“Nope. Not one bit.” His love sighed and stepped between them. “Okay, you two. That’s it. Neither of you are going to have a say in what the nursery looks like.”

“Oh come on!” “But Detective!”

“It won’t be a hellscape,” she reassured Lucifer first before turning to Maze, “but it also won’t be mundane and cutesy. Neither of you are going to want to gorge out your eyes coming in here.”

“Are you going to at least have a few knives hanging around?” Maze really wanted things her way, even though they compromised earlier with letting several of her knives lay around the penthouse just in case she needed an extra when someone broke in.

“NO,” both expecting parents said in unison. The demon scoffed and started towards the door. Lucifer turned to his partner, still on edge. “Are you certain I can’t -”

“Not if it means arguing with Maze like this.” Chloe took a deep breath before coming up with something. “We’ll still use ‘only the finest’, as you insisted, but let us,” she pointed between herself and their contractor, “figure out what is right. I… kind of have an idea now. And I think you’ll like it.”

“If it makes you most comfortable, I’m certain it will be exquisite.” As always, he had her back. At least they were getting the place soundproofed first. He looked over to Debora, deciding if it was okay to leave them alone now. She clearly didn’t mean them any harm, since she could see and talk to Chloe, but it was hard to push back the paranoia he built up after hearing the words ‘I’m pregnant’ coming out of her lips. He nodded to himself, coming up with a playful zinger to be dismissed on. “Unless it’s a ‘90’s boyband theme. Seriously, you need to update your playlist.”

True to form, his detective gave an offended smile and slapped his arm. “Get out of here so we can talk. Both of you.”

“Of course, darling.” He grinned as he backed towards the door, almost chasing Maze out with him. “And I think I’ll introduce you to some actual good tunes while we wait for the two of you to finish.”

“Uh huh, sure. Just get out of here before I shoot you.” Good humor confirmed, Lucifer and Maze left the mortals to their own devices. It was half an hour until three anyway so they shouldn’t be too absorbed in talks. At least they were guaranteed no pink monstrosities or cherubs on the walls. How sickening would that be!

Maze grumbled. “I wanted a hellscape.”

Her boss rolled his eyes. “You already painted your room that way, what more could you want?”

“A throne for the new prince of Hell.”

The Devil’s stomach rolled and tightened at the thought. His spawn would be the legitimate heir to Hell. This wasn’t a belief, it was a fact. But Charlie hadn’t shown any signs of Celestial power yet, so maybe, just maybe, he was more human than angel. If Charlie was that way, then there was a possibility this one would be the same. How he wished he could pray that was the case. Nothing of Chloe’s should be in Hell, and he’d fight all the demons in all the realms to ensure it. “Maze -”

“I know, I know. You don’t want the kid to go to Hell. But when the kid gets here, you’re gonna have to tell him who you are and he’s going to learn all about it anyway. Why not go in prepared?” The demon really didn’t get it. She liked Hell. Lucifer didn’t. He shook his head, knowing this was a losing battle. Maze just pressed on. “Okay, what about when he sees your devil face? Are you even planning on letting it see you?”

His heart nearly dropped to his feet, his gut going with it. His hand shook and he averted his eyes as far as he could. All of Lucifer’s focus went to not changing even the slightest to his devil form in a second. He really did not want to think about this. Talk about this. He couldn’t hear Maze ramble on about how the spawn would have to see it’s father in all his celestial and demonic glory, or how it would have questions about where he went every week and why he was covered in ash upon his return. Everything about the future urchin was pushed to the side as the very real threat to Chloe’s life hung over him like an ax, threatening to overtake them at any moment.

Taking a final deep breath, and having ignored everything Maze said for the past five minutes – making the demon concerned for him even if she said nothing – he smiled at her and turned towards the elevators. “I believe I have a shipment to look over. And you have a certain spawn to fetch.”

“She’s not a dog,” Maze joked, but it was clear she got his point. Conversation over. Now was not the time to think about the new spawn’s arrival. Not for him at least.

* * *

Lucifer returned to the penthouse after Deborah left and immediately went back to his detective to know what she had planned. Chloe in turn just grinned at him. “You’ll see soon enough. She’s going to bring in her crew in three days to get everything done. Except the crib.”

“Why not the crib?” He was relieved they would be back in three days time, allowing him to do his time in Hell and be back for everything – as much as he trusted Maze to look after her in his absence, he still wasn’t comfortable letting her be away from his protection for too long – but the one exception was a mystery. “Isn’t that why we hired them?”

His love’s mischievous grin stirred him up, and she knew it. “Rite of passage. You,” she pointed at his chest harshly, “are responsible for putting our baby’s crib together.”

The Devil choked. He wasn’t even drinking at the time! “Me! You want me to make a crib!”

“Put it together.” Chloe repeated. “Every first time dad has to do it.”

“I certainly will not!” The very thought of it! Him! The Devil! Putting a crib together! That was a torture in Hell! He was not about to suffer through that! “That’s what contractors are for!”

“It’s also what Dads are for.” She eyed him slowly, reminding him who really was in charge there. “What? Scared of Ikea? Who knew the big, bad Devil was terrified of baby furniture.”

“Detective…” This was ridiculous. There was no reason he had to put a spawn’s sleeping cage together. He’d seen enough of them already.

“I’m carrying the baby.” Her finality made him stop. “The least you can do, with your own hands, is put a crib together.”

Lucifer grimaced slightly and shook his head. “I’m more likely to break it than put one together.”

Chloe nodded, accepting that answer. “Then we buy three and between them, we’ll have at least one whole and stable crib. Besides, Maze helped Amenadiel. She’ll keep you from making too much of a mess.”

“The only way she’ll help is by bringing popcorn.” He shook his head, giving in. “Fine. I’ll make the bloody thing.”

“It won’t be bloody,” she insisted, getting a short laugh from him as she brought up her phone and found what she wanted. “It’ll be a dark brown stained mahogany, and has some matching items for around the room that the pros will be handling.”

“So that’s your theme?” He inched over her shoulder, looking at the set. Just from a glance, he couldn’t complain about her choices. Boring, maybe, but tasteful and classy too. Looked like she was headed for a soothing aesthetic. “Dark brown?”

“It’s the furniture only,” Chloe reminded him, smirking. “The rest of the room’s going to be a surprise.”

“Can’t be much of a surprise if I’m putting the crib together.”

She shook her head, her smile growing. “The furniture isn’t going to give it away. Don’t worry, Lucifer, you’ll love it. I promise.”

Of course he would love it. His miracle was the one behind it.

* * *

The following day he picked up the three cribs they ordered from the outlet. The day after he spent in hell, memorizing the manual coming with one of them. And on the third day, as he predicted, Lucifer struggled with putting a suitable crib together without breaking it while Maze watched, eating popcorn. Deborah’s workers were vetted quickly and left to do their jobs while the Devil struggled to put a tiny human cage together. What was the point of memorizing that hideous manual if he couldn’t find half the pieces he needed and broke the other half!

Cursing loudly, he was thoroughly occupied as men worked on one room in his apartment, not allowing him to pick up any hints as to what the end product was going to look like. He just about finished putting the blasted thing together – needing only two of them instead of three – when the final two were putting their tools away to take back down stairs. One of them looked at the finished product and smiled. “Need a hand getting it in the room, sir?”

Lucifer eyed the man and his paint stained overalls. New midnight blue stains were nearly dry on them and the Detective was talking to the designer in the hallway; they were practically done and even had the furniture nearly in place – apparently they needed to let parts of the walls dry first. Beatrice was already back from school and dinner was heavy on all their minds, so it was likely these men had to get to their respective homes and eat as well. Not like it was that heavy for him anyway. He shook his head. “No, I think I’ve got it. You lot aught to go home and get something to eat.”

The man shrugged, still smiling. “If you’re sure. Best of luck and congratulations.”

The men tipped their hats and went to the elevator with their items before disappearing for good. They were really lucky with their contractors. Then again, this was LA. Weirdos were the norm with high end jobs. He shook his head, wondering if he was indeed being too paranoid about all of this. Not everyone believed he was the Devil and this spawn the Anti-Christ. Seemingly, most didn’t. But it just took one nut getting too close to do the job. Just one.

He took in a breath and looked back to the finished crib. To make the woman he loved happy, he’d do anything, including put together this mini-prison. The height was easily adjustable and it was set at exactly the spots for what they recommended for newborns. Hopefully…

Lucifer closed his eyes and took slow breaths through his nose, exhaling through his mouth. Don’t think about it. Just think about the now. This would make Chloe happy, and that in turn would make him happy. Make him less scared. Think only of the now. And right now he finished making the crib.

He heard his love saying something to the designer as she drew closer to him, letting him realize he narrowly avoided another one of his strange panic attacks. Bloody hell, he had no idea what triggered them half the time. If he wasn’t freaking out and running away physically, he was freezing up and doing so mentally. That was no good for anyone. He had to get past this! He had to! For Chloe!

He felt Chloe’s fingers on his arm first, getting him to look over to her. Worry edged onto her face, but a small smile from him attempted to put her at ease. He wasn’t completely gone this time. “I’m alright. Just… thinking too hard.”

She nodded but kept a reassuring hand on him. Lucifer took her hand in his and kissed her fingers gently. He was fine and he was getting better. No ‘eczema’ this time. Almost snapping around, he turned to Deborah behind them. “Well then, I believe your work here is done?”

“Mostly,” the woman agreed. She smiled graciously as she read the room. “There are a few small details to attend to, but I believe we can complete those tomorrow evening?”

She looked to Chloe and she nodded. “Tomorrow around 7 good for you? My schedule’s pretty consistent these days.”

Lucifer bit back a laugh at that. Working cold cases mostly involved paperwork and internet searches. Only occasionally did they find a lead bringing them a person to interrogate and spice things up. Helped that he brought some names down to Hell on Sundays and could ask questions there too. It was amazing how many cases he could solve just by popping into a cell and asking the bugger who killed them. Twice he found the killer also in Hell and they were only working these cases for a month! Lt. Bear was going to get hundreds of cases solved solely because the Devil had all the connections. Boring though the desk work was, their schedule was very consistent of late.

Deborah nodded, said her goodbyes, and left shortly after, leaving the two alone. Beatrice was practicing self defense with Maze at the moment, so it gave them a chance alone with the finished crib. The Devil smiled at his miracle and showed it off. “Take a look, Love! I managed it after all! And I only needed two sets.”

“Impressive.” Chloe smiled as she ran her hand over the wood, both impressed and amused. “And in a single afternoon. Took Dan an entire weekend and he went off script, drilling screws into the base when he lost a few of the pieces.”

Normally the Detective didn’t compare the two men, not wanting to start anything, but this time Lucifer was grateful. “Bet it came out scarred and wobbly.”

“It became firewood after Trixie turned two and jumped too hard on one side.” She shook her head, smiling at the memory. “She needed a new bed anyway, but we didn’t know how to stop her from escaping and running off in the middle of the night then either. Crazy escape artist.”

Lucifer’s blood chilled at the idea. “Spawn escape these things?”

“Frequently, when they start crawling and walking. Babies can be quite clever.” She turned and watched him as the Devil looked towards the elevator then balcony. If Beatrice at two could escape two detectives precautions, he could only imagine what would happen if this one was mobile. Maybe he’d have to call in a few more favors and find a way to keep the urchin there through metaphysical methods. Chloe’s hand on his shoulder yanked him out of these thoughts, a soft smile on her lips. “Hey, it’s going to be fine. There’s two of us to watch this one. And Maze. And Trixie. Between all of us, I’m certain we can keep one half angel from disappearing in the middle of the night.”

“I wish I had your confidence,” he admitted, trying to smile back at her. He really didn’t want to think about it. He put his hand on hers and decided to change the subject. “So! How do we get this mini-cage into the big one?”

The detective rolled her eyes, shaking her head and barely attempting to hide a smile. “It’s not a cage. It’s a nursery. And you really should see it.”

“I thought walls were still drying.” Rooms took a lot longer to set up than he thought it would, and this time he didn’t have the luxury of being out and about while contractors worked.

“They are, but the best parts are all set. Come on.” She pulled on his hand and guided him to the once guest room turned spawn den. The door was slightly ajar and he could hear fans blowing to speed up the drying process and dispersing the fumes, but he couldn’t see directly into it yet. His love stopped him short, excited enough to perk his curiosity. “Close your eyes for a sec, okay? It’ll be more dramatic.”

That got him to grin, shaking his head. “Very well.”

He did as asked and let Chloe pull him into the center of the room, feeding on her enthusiasm. When she let his hand drop, he wondered if this truly was as amazing as she wanted him to think it was. “Okay, open them.”

And he did.

Blinking his eyes into focus, his smile slowly faded as he took him the room. His eyes widened slowly as he turned about, absorbing the sight. The walls and ceiling were painted midnight blue with the space closing to the floor from about three feet up softly changing into a lighter, dawn like blue. Not quite white spots seemed to be scattered over the first coat in no seeming pattern. One area seemed to have a light river of this design, but it seemed natural instead of a mistake, and oh so painfully familiar. And dangling from the ceiling, just out of reach even for him stretching, were several strings of lights so small, on their own they wouldn’t light a doll house.

All together, it was the night sky without a cloud or moon in sight.

Lucifer didn’t realize how much he missed seeing the stars like this, and his heart ached almost painfully seeing it again. It was…

“It’s not quite done yet,” Chloe started, her voice reaching into him as he continued to stare. “I mean, there’s the constellations and planets to be added, and figuring out where to put a normal light source, plus the curtains. But I figured, who better to put up the stars than the guy who made them in the first place!”

He looked back to her, eyes itching to water and his throat closing up a little. His love held several sheets and a few bags of glow in the dark stars of different sizes, looking a little awkward now. Her enthusiasm was fading and he knew it was his fault. Biting her bottom lip a little, she looked up to him, unsure. “Do you like it?”

“It’s amazing.” His voice came out softly, unsure how he wanted to react. “This is… better than I could ever imagine.” He saw the tension bleed out of her from his approval. “How did you come up with this?”

“Well…” Chloe looked away for a moment before trying to explain. “You’ve been so… hesitant about everything that I thought it’d be a good idea to make this into everything you already love. I mean, whenever you talk about making the stars, you kind of… glow. They’re your babies. And you love them.

“I just thought it’d be a good idea to have all your babies in one place. At least a little.”

Speechless. Only Chloe Decker could leave the Devil like that on multiple occasions, and this was one of them. Smiling with tears in his eyes, Lucifer closed the distance between them and hugged her tightly. She knew how he thought of his stars, even though he rarely spoke of them. They were his creations that everyone praised. His ‘children’ in a sense. And she brought them home to him.

“It’s perfect,” he murmured into her ear. He felt her grin back at him, hugging him back. He needed this. He really needed this.

Slowly, he slid out of their embrace and took the pale imitations of his children from her hands. “And I will gladly decorate the heavens for you, Chloe. Better than anyone else could.”

“I look forward to learning all about them.” She put her hand on her belly, smiling tenderly. “And so does this little one. There’s no better way to teach it about it’s daddy than sharing your other darlings with it.”

For a moment, Lucifer looked to her belly, his smile shrinking back a bit. His spawn. His first real creation since his stars. It rested there with his most precious detective. A new kind of life. A new light he started.

He raised a hand, almost joining hers there.

The Devil’s spawn was also a risk to its mother’s life.

Moment cast out of his mind, he brought his hand back in and stepped away, looking to the starless walls. “So, how long until they’re completely dry? I think I should start with Polaris and move out from there. Just the important ones you can see from Earth, mind you. If I put every star created up there, you’d never see the paint!”

He didn’t see his love shake her head in disappointment, but he didn’t need to. He also didn’t see her accept it with a smile and move on with him. This was a lot to take in and he had to take it slowly or he’d probably burn. At least he wasn’t watching her every move like he did in the beginning, but Lucifer Morningstar, the Light bringer, was not quite ready to deal with being a father. Not yet at least.

* * *

Maze’s reaction to the room could be summed up into a disappointed sigh but not hating it. At least she could strangle people with the dangling lights if she needed to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I want that nursery for my bedroom. Love stars! Have since I was little and my parents couldn't afford a nursery so this isn't based on anything real.  
> Headcanon: Lucifer sleeps closest to the door and there's a curtain for a door for these two. Also, the stairs to the penthouse is out of sight/out of mind but exist because fire regulations. I have a short fic I want to write in the future where Chloe asks where the stairs are and Lucifer doesn't know. XD  
> As for the layout of the place, I just came up with it on the fly. Same with the security system. And Lucifer forgetting his key-card all the time because he never really needed one before.  
> I should shut up. Next one will happen in the future and be a bit more medical if I know right.
> 
> Also, if you want to see my island on Animal Crossing (yes, that's where I've been! don't give me those looks!) my friend code's on my profile. Evenings AZ time is usually when you can find me, but send a heads up first. ^^V


End file.
